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She ignored the cringing of those around her at the lolspeak. "Come on, anyone? Something good—something scary! That's what this holiday is about, right?"

"Ah, come on Ix! You're more competent than you think you are. And to hear Charlotte tell it, you're a pretty good healer. But... well, you were an Auror, weren't you? It makes sense."

He felt Thoth's hand clamp down on is shoulder. "Tom. I believe you should leave her be for now."

"Ah! Okay..." said Tom, Thoth's grim giving him noticeable discomfort. "We can talk about something else, I guess."

Would it be more accurate to say, instead of describing it as mind control, that the very existence of a Mary Sue warps reality in a certain area? A bit like how gravitational fields work if I need to give an analogy.

...has at least one sequel and put it in Unclaimed Badfics? I know series are allowed, like the Rose Potter one.

https://supersaiyancrash.deviantart.com/gallery/31116749/Crash-Bandicoot-Retold

Hi newbie! Have a block of katchi katchin, the hardest metal in the dragonball multiverse. You have one opportunity to change its shape.

"I'm not a trained Healer, I can only do little cuts and things."

"She once fixed her own broken arm—"

"That's child's play—"

"And healed me up when my nose got broken in human disguise—"

"Any half-decent wizard can do that—"

"And fixed up those burns she got up her face from that dragon—"

"Charlotte!" Ix cried. "Just tell him to go to Medical! I can barely take care of myself, let alone other people!"

Charlotte nodded at Derik. "You tell that to him yourself, then," she said. At her words, Ix promptly clammed up and took a half-step to the side, putting Charlotte between her and everyone else.

The chainsword sounds pretty cool...and thanks for the alcohol and coffee, too!

Yeah, go on fanfiction.net and search either swing123 or garfieldodie (or, alternitavey, search "The Calvinverse" on Tv Tropes), they're probably some of the best known C&H writers out there.

Jenni withdrew completely, like a luminous green and blue anemone retreating into its dark column. She wouldn't have let anything bad happen, but he was right; she had no excuse to be projecting all over the place like a neonate. Cut off and alone in her mind again, she felt diminished, but at his ending words she raised her eyes, and their liveliness had returned.

"You're not so bad yourself," she said, smiling. "I'd say 'any time', but I'm under some pretty tight restrictions here. This was probably a once-off thing." She sighed and turned to Derik. "How's it feel?"

He'd been flexing his hand, testing it out, and he nodded. "Still numb, of course, but moving well. Strong. Thank you, friends. I am unworthy of you." At Charlotte's remark, he added, "The next time I do something that stupid, I'll come to Ix first, and spare everyone else a repeat performance." Even he wasn't sure how much he meant it.

"It is, in fact, done." He turned to Jenni. "Do try to keep a tighter grip on your aura in the future should we work together again. I am sensitive to such things, and the additional distraction makes it harder to keep my mind focused. I can, of course, do it, but there is no need to make the task more difficult. And I do not like to think of what may happen if my focus were to slip. Other than that..." He gave a short bow. "It was a pleasure to work with you. You are clearly quite skilled."

"You know, it would've been a lot easier for everyone involved if you'd just let Ix do that," she said.

The sensation wasn't painful, exactly; more of a deep itch as his tissue and bone knit itself back together at rapid speed. He watched in fascination.

Jenni did chip in a little, helping to sweep the excess lymph and the debris of broken cells away from the fracture site, to be disposed of properly by the appropriate organs. Mere janitorial work, really, but it gave her satisfaction to be an active part of the effort. It was good to do what she was meant for, and she was pleased with the painstaking job Thoth was doing, too. She shared her love with the others—all of them, for a brief moment, before she reined in her aura again.

"... Is it done?" Derik asked.

Thoth released the energy, keeping it tightly controlled as he pushed in into Derik, concentrating on the task at hand. He could not lose control, but to think as such was to do so. He kept his mind above such thoughts, focusing on what he was doing in that instant: bringing the bones together, sealing the cuts and scrapes, ensuring that his corrections did not cause additional damage.

He may have been, by the standards of the Pavoni, a poor biomancer. But he'd had 10,000 years to hone the craft channeling power from a more chaotic source. Well, more or less 10,000. Time was funny in the Eye. But he wasn't thinking about that, not now.

(Yeah, on YouTube there's this great electronic music composer and game developer! known as SYRSA, and he(?) made a great song that has been renamed to Daunter, but was originally called Yonk. I guess it's because he was annoyed that the song became heavily associated with the Team Fortress 2 fandom? Or that a remix of the song that didn't indicate that it was a remix got confused with the original and was sometimes more popular than his version? Anyway.)

2. Hah, that sounds pretty fun.

3. You're getting it! Double comedy!

4. Oh ho ho do I have a lot to teach you! I'm not familiar with Boom Boom Boom, so I'm probably thinking it's from Wolfenstein The New Order. Anyway, enjoy!

-Twistey

I mean, well, everything has a fandom (I myself am part of the Animusic fandom), but I never knew of the Calvin and Hobbes fanbase being all that active in terms of creating fan work and whatnot. That's really interesting.

-Twistey

*Picks splinters out of my id* Hmm. So if we accidentally find ourselves doing that, how do we decide which fanfics get sporked and which ones we leave alone and forget (at least until somebody possibly rediscovers them in a more ethical manner)? Do we choose the top 3 worst ones, or what? And when sporking said fics, is it okay to start on them then or would it better to wait until you've forgotten about how much terrible fiction the author wrote?

-Twistey

Merging a little more deeply into Thoth's consciousness, she could feel his concentration and concern, and liked him better for it.

~The body has everything it needs to heal itself, wanting only time and energy,~ she advised, ~but it tends to go overboard if left to its own devices. The trick is to restrain as much as to encourage... like a carefully pruned topiary. Though, that said, don't let's leave any bone matrix in the shape of dolphins or unicorns or whatever.~

It was a funny image, but she withdrew it and got serious, not wishing to undo Thoth's mental preparations. She laid a hand on his, just to reinforce that she was there, ready to help and guide if necessary. "Ready, Derik?" She put her other hand on his shoulder again, completing the circuit.

He was watching them, aware that things were happening beyond his ken. With his pain dulled by numbweed, curiosity surfaced and his resentment at being ganged up on receded. He nodded. "Yes."

Jenni nodded back. ~In your own time, then.~

Take a bolter or chainsword, a flask of mjød and a mug of Klatchian coffee. If you drink both of them at the same time slowly maybe they'll neutralize one another and neither of them will kill you.

Welcome! Have a seventeen feet long wool knit scarf and a bag of jellybabies. Use them irresponsibly!

He marshalled his thoughts, going through the Enumerations in his head, focusing his mind on the task at hand.This was a simple task, really, but he wasn't the most adept biomancer, and it wouldn't do to make a mistake now.

He lay his hands gently upon Derik's arm, feeling the damage, finding the best ways to correct it.

+Yes. I can hear you. I am ready.+

My oldest son who pre-dates all the Peter Jackson Tolkien movies, is named after a character from the Hobbit. Middle name, but still there.

I mean, as in a literal martyr. According to what I was told of his legend, he was crucified by Japanese soldiers after his defeat in defending a hill in order to cover the British retreat from Malaya.

I made my own drop spindle (using a plastic toy umbrella as the base, actually) - to that end, I did have to look up what a drop spindle looks like. I, stubborn as I was, didn't look anything up but instead just fiddled around until I got something that seemed threadlike. It probably would have been a lot easier and faster to pick up if I had looked for help and used the proper materials.

"I don't know if that's a thing," Jenni added, "but anyway, I am." She popped open a case on her utility belt and produced a small, brown glass jar that contained a creamy white salve.

While she gently rubbed a dollop into Derik's knuckles (numbing her own fingers in the process), she opened her mind and tentatively reached out to Thoth, just brushing the edge of his awareness. ~Testing, testing... is this thing on?~ She glanced up and gave him a wry half-smile. She was nervous, and a little embarrassed to be nervous, and she let him feel it. It wasn't personal, it was just a sort of bitter aftertaste, a dissonant semitone, that was woven into the fabric of his universe and set her on edge. It scared her, not so much because she felt threatened, but because she felt tempted to address it. What might a being like herself accomplish in sweetening what was bitter, in tuning the clashing chords, and bringing redemption and hope where there was only tragedy and despair?

Not enough, and yet too much.

(( Jenni: Freelance Power of Healing and Second Chances. Or something like that. Just to be clear, the Chaos Gods would eat her for breakfast. ))