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Full Title: Five Times Dawn McKenna Cut Her Hair Accidentally (And One Time She Did It On Purpose)

A/N: So this is a slightly different kind of story than the other one I started posting below. That one's a romance, but this...well, the PPC really lacks 5+1 fics, which I think is such a shame! So I've decided to write one. And since Agent Dawn is one of my favorites, and she's had long hair for ages, I figured it'd be fun to show a couple of ways she could cut it! With or without a little help...

Enjoy!! And don't forget to R&R (and Read & Review too! ;) )


I.

Dawn was running through a Narnian forest, her long brown braid flying out behind her and thumping annoyingly against her back. It had already been a long day: first of all, she was in Narnia, which hardly ever happened. That would have been nice, if it hadn’t been so long since she’d read the books that she wasn’t completely sure of half the charges, and was having to rely on her partner.

Secondly, her partner. Ugh.

Oh, Supernumerary was a good enough agent. That wasn’t really in question.

What was in question was his attitude: which was dreadful. There were no two ways about it: working with ‘Nume’, as his lovely partner Ilraen had called him, was to suffer.

‘Nume’ was rolling his eyes now: she could just tell from his tone of voice. “Splendid. Caspian’s just landed a killing blow on Aslan. This should be...fun to sort out.”

“What about Peter killing that wolf? Maugrim?” Dawn asked. She was panting: she hadn’t had to run so much in a while.

She could feel the look of disdain from three feet away. “That is canon. Do you never reread books?”

Before she could retort angrily that yes, actually, she did reread books, loved to, in fact, but just hadn’t felt like rereading Narnia recently, something stopped Dawn short. She shrieked as she was pulled backwards by her hair.

“What now?” Nume demanded, but even he fell silent when faced by the sight that met his eyes:

Dawn was trying not to cry from the pain of having her hair pulled with so much force--and no wonder: her braid was tangled firmly in and around the grasp of a moving tree. It was one of the Suefluenced ones, and its twigs went through the braid even as vines wove their way in and around it.

“Oh,” said Nume.

“Ow,” said Dawn, as well as a fine number of further words which aren’t fit to print. “Ow!”

“I, er.” Nume fixed the tree with a look; it froze, but didn’t release Dawn. “Er. I don’t think I can untangle this.”

Dawn said another few words which can’t be printed, and Nume winced.

“Language,” he said weakly. “Er...I think I might have to cut it off.”

“No,” Dawn groaned. “Oh, great. This would happen. What a splendid day this is.”

“Hold still,” Nume said a little more strongly. He took out a knife; Dawn closed her eyes.

“Try to make it even,” she said.

Nume tried.

He really did.

*

When they got back to the RC, Ilraen stared at Dawn. <> he asked.

Dawn groaned. “Long story short, he had to cut my braid off. One of the Sued trees had it. It’s not even remotely even, is it?”

Ilraen managed to make a clucking sound without a mouth, which was really quite impressive. <>

“I don’t drink the stuff,” Dawn said glumly, “but I’ll happily drink some tea. Lots of it. And then I have to somehow find a hairdresser...they exist somewhere around here, right? I haven’t had to do more than cut off split ends in years.”

<> Ilraen said comfortingly. He put a hand on Dawn’s arm. <>



A/N: So that was the first part! What do you think? I have the whole thing planned out, so I won't be taking suggestions...except maybe for another way she could have to accidentally cut her hair. I'm still deciding on one of those.

I'm really excited for the next chapter!! Aren't you? :) Thanks for reading (and don't forget to leave me some tasty reviews...)

I jsut stardet reading this and it's so cool! I r.r. luyke the lotus flowre in the breeze! And the gllowing wyes! And I can't w8 to c what ahppens next!

XOXOX

Okay so I really really like how you made Ix not ugly, like ew werewolfs are supposed too be hot so thank you for fixxing that! Also I think you should name Chralotte's spider named Ron! Write more I wanna see Jacques fall in love with one of them!

A/N: So this is going to be amazing! I hope you enjoy it lots :) I'm not new to this beautiful fandom, but I fancy myself a little more grown up than when I first entered, and so I've changed my screen name. I'm not going to tell you who I am (at least not right away!!) though: I want to show you all how much I've grown as a person and a writer without being immediately associated with my previous works!

So, this is a love story in the end :) But don't worry! It'll also have some adventure! ;) But I love these characters and they deserve some happiness...so here goes!!

A Tale of Two Women
Chapter One!

Jacques POV

I’ve made a change in myself; hopefully for the better. You see, I’ve got really bored of all this emptiness: I need to stop flirting with everyone, stop sleeping with anyone with a post code--oh yeah, I saw that clip--and start focusing on what’s important: finding my True Love.

I mean, that’s really all anyone wants. And I’m no different. It’s even stronger for me, I thing, because I was a fictional character to start out with…

Charlotte POV:

I was sitting in my chair last night--I’m a vampire, so I don’t need to sleep--with my pet Tarantula and thinking. Ix looks so nice when she’s asleep; she always looks nice, but at night she doesn’t worry about her scars. She’s at peace--well, sometimes. Other times she tosses and turns and cries out from nightmares. It makes me want to go hunt down everyone who’s ever hurt her and become a different kind of assassin.

Tonight she looked different ,though. More at peace. She’d been to this awesome slumber party--I wish I could’ve gone with her, but I couldn’t stand to be around so many people--and she came back with a makeover. I liked the way she looked before, but this is nice too and she seems so much happier: most of her scars are gone, and her hair is long--almost as long as mine. It falls in beautiful silken waves down her back. It even has purple high lights now, which look great. But everything looks great on her.

I haven’t told her yet that we’re moving to ESAS. She deserves a good night’s sleep--for once. But in the morning I’ll have to tell her.

I wonder what she’ll think.

Jacques POV: Eventually I decided to go to bed, fending off Luxury along the way. I wonder what tomorrow will bring?


Preview of next chapter:

“Don’t look at me, Charlotte, I’m hideous!”

“I thought...I thought you’d love me, if you loved anyone.”

“Oh, hey. Are you guys new here? I could...show you around…”


A/N: So, what'd you think? Tell me all about it! ALSO! What should Charlotte's tarantula be named? Vote in the comments!!

I sat in the courtyward head in my hands sobbing. It felt like my heart was going to break! Shatter into a hundred million tiny peices that peirced my soul.....

"ITS NOT FAIR!", I said sobbing. "I love him but he doesn't truly love me back!! He doesn't see me for who I really am and it's not fair!"

Dafidd held me and stroked my hair while I cried in his chest. "Shh there there, it's okay", he said quietly then gasping.

"What is it?", I said sniffling.

"You have the Windflower Birthmark!" Dafidd said gasping. He touched the birthmark on my neck and I slapped it away. It was a really ugly birthmark that looked like a lotus blossom dancing in the breeze and I hated it because it made me look so different from everyone and Arwen would tease me on it.

"I didn't say you could touch me now leave me alone!", I shout and lie down on the rock still crying now tears of sad and embarrassment too.

"But Jess", Dafidd tried to say but I screamed at him and he went away.

Little did I know that the birthmark on my neck was starting to glow or that my eyes had turned red and purple. The Windflower legacy was about to awaken!

AN: DUN DUN DUN! Don't worry dear readers, Numie and Jess will get together soon!

What Bram's been doing to improve her ability to function in an online community. Has she sought therapy, for instance? Found a support group of some sort? Gotten on the same page with her husband, at least, who she was apparently falling out with some time back? She says she feels she's ready. Okay. I wanna know what work she's done to arrive at this conclusion, and what she thinks she can do better now than she had done before.

~Neshomeh

AN: Thanks again to everyone kind enough to leave reviews! I'm always in favour of concrit, and (and this is directed at MrsSupernumerary of this parish) I recognise that the format can be a little unforgiving on the eyes. Nevertheless, it's a fun writing challenge to do an entire fic in the phonetic accent of Doktor Trollenfisch, so here I am. Doing it. >=]

I don't own anything except the combination of boredom, caffeine, and a dilapidated computer that allows me to create this fine body of work.

Content Warning: This fic is rated Mature, or 18 in civilised countries. If you're under the age, don't read it. If you're over the age, do read it! And get in touch if you can bulk-buy Angel Delight, I need a lot of it for a series of excellent and very pertinent reasons which this content warning is too narrow to contain.

===

It vas beink several morninks after zer mornink after all zer commotion und schvoodilypoopinK had begun, und Luxury, zer Aviator, und zer good Doktor Trollenfisch vere loungink artfully on zeir shared orange-flavoured jelly bed. It vas beink vun of zer mandatory "Please Be Rememberink How To Brain Und Movement Und Vords Und Brain" breaks, vhich vere largely necessitated by ein combination of stamina und some very interestink Poffins zat zer Doktor made ein mental note to never, ever introduce to Gabrielle. Not zat zis vas beink too big of ein problem; zer adorable leetle Flareon vas mostly livink und vorkink in zer Male Post-Natal Depression Vard of FicPsych, vhere she could be ein therapy-fluffball to any and all Draco Malfoys who vere crossink her path.

As he lay reminiscink in zer paddlink pool, Luxury und zer Aviator got quietly to zeir feet und sneaked off sneakily to zer Responsezentrum's en-suite. A few moments later, zhey came back und called for zer Doktor, vhich caused their mountainous cleavage to jiggle und bounce around like four blancmanges on ein extremely active trampoline. For vunce, zough, zat vas not beink vhat caught zer Doktor's eye, at least not for more zan ein couple of minutes. Nein, his eyes vere drawn inescapably to zeir necks.

"Are you likink zem?" Zer Aviator asked. "Beink ein Time Lord, I am not really sleepink all zat much-"

"I am not beink sure anyvun has been sleepink all zat much," Luxury interjected vizz ein lascivious expression.

"... Vell, ja, but it means I have been havink zer time to make zese! Zey are leetle tokens to be showink everyvun who ist seeink zem zat Agent Luxury und mein self are belongink primarily to you!"

Vhat zer Aviator vas referrink to vas zer collars of bright neon-pink leather zat adorned zer vomen's necks. Zey vere also spiked vizz vhat, upon beink inspected more closely by Doktor Trollenfisch, transpired to be beink his own qwills. Lastly, zey vere beink adorned vizz ein metal tag inscribed vizz ein image of zer Doktor und ein meesage sayink "if found, please return to zis Trollenfisch along vizz any uzzer small items and/or packets of orange-flavoured gelatin". Vhich vas proof of zer Aviator's skill at collar fabrication, as zer writink vas qwite small.

Zer Doktor vas beink delighted vizz zer new development! "Oh, meine kleine FlugzeugundTARDISmädchen! Meine kleine Luxurischemädchen! Zis ist beink ein most frabjous day! Calloo und indeed callay! Ve must be celebratink zis turn of events, my vord yes!"

"Vell," began Agent Luxury, "if ve vant to be celebratink in zer usual fashion, ve must first be retrievink all zer greasy frogs-"

"Ach, ve can celebrate like zat later vunce ve have found zer pickle jar. I am talkink about goink out to celebrate! Vhat are you sayink to Rudi's?"

"I zink ve are both sayink ein big, bouncy jawohl, mein Doktor!" Zer Aviator grabbed her new partners in ein big und sqwishy hug, zer inevitable results of vhich delayed zeir departure by roughly seven hours. After zat, und vunce zer girls had found some clozink zat remained un-gooped, zey journeyed off to Rudi's to celebrate zeir newly-minted Polyculenvanteneinencrackeren!

It vas beink ein fairly crowded evenink in Rudi's bierkeller, vizz many agents, support personnel, und miscellaneous lifeforms zat vere mostly zere for people to look at and go "Wow, zer Headqwarters of zer PPC ist beink ein big und diverse place vizz many interesting-but-still-humanoid-and-thus-boinkable aliens!" in attendance. Most everyvun had zer remains of ein cocktail or seven on zeir tables und vere in varying states of deshabillé, vhich informed zer Doktor (whom, it must be said, had razzer lost track) zat it vas indeed beink ein Vednesday. Zer Pink Trio vere lookink around for ein spare table vhen a call came up from vun of zer booths.

"Agent zer Aviator? Ist zat beink you? Come here, come here, please be comink to sit vizz us!"

Zer Aviator spun around. "Oh, mein Doktor, it ist beink mein friends Ix und Charlotte! I am thinkink ve should be sittink vizz zem und sharing our good news!"

"I am quite agreeink, meine kleine FlugzeugundTARDISmädchen! Onvard, to zer booth!"

Zer three squeezed zemselves into Ix und Charlotte's booth, ein protracted progress vhich (particularly in zer case of zer Aviator's sumptuous vomanly assets) necessitated zer use of butter und also sometimes ein crowbar. At last, zo, everyvun vas seated in ein vay vhich zhey found comfortable, or at least vas not beink involvink ein elbow to zer funbags.

"Oh, zat ist beink tremendous news," said Charlotte excitedly vunce zer Aviator had told zem er previous events, includink zer bits involvink zer rubber bicycle tyres und zer industrial-grade valrus costume. "I am - nein, ve are beink zo happy for you! Isn't zat right, liebling?"

"Oh, ja," said Ix, zo zere vas ein quietness to vhat she said. "Ve are both beink zo happy for you."

Doktor Trollenfisch picked up on zer tone immediately. "Meine kleine Gelegentlichpelzigtmädchen, vhatever ist beink zer matter!"

"Oh, Doktor, you are seeink through mein cunning emotional disguise, und noticink zat I am not beink mein usual happy-go-lucky und bouncy self!" Ix sighed und shook her head. "It ist nothink you can be beink helpink vizz anyvay. It ist not beink ein think vizz vhich anyvun can be beink helpink."

"If zere ist somezink you are needink to be gettink off your chest," zer Doktor began, but he vas beink interrupted almost immediately by ein sob from Agent Ix!

"Oh, mein Doktor, it ist vhat ist beink on mein chest zat ist zer problem! I vas practicink mein Potterverse magics und mein vand happened to backfire vhen I vas casting ein Engorgement Charm, und zhen, vell... zis happened!"

Zer ESAS Agent threw open her robes und pulled down zer front zipper of her skintight latex bodysuit (vhich zer Doktor had hitherto been unavare came in zer colours of Gryffindor House), to reveal ein huge pair of truly vomanly enormoboobs! How zer latex had been keepink zhem sqwished inside to zer point vhere nothink had been seemink amiss, zer Doktor did not know or indeed care to speculate.

"... You know, meine kleine Gelegentlichpelzigmädchen, zis might just be beink mein lucky day."

"Your lucky day?"

"Zat's right, your lucky day." Zer Doktor steeled himself for zer comink hardships, or at least for zer comink hardness. "I may vell be beink in possession of ein solution to your two big, swinging, jubblytastic problems, but zer treatment ist beink extremely complex und in-depth."

"Complex und in-depth! Oh, liebe Arceus! I am feelink zat I should be havink mein partner und mein liebling Charlotte zhere to be beink mein moral support, as vell as beink any uzzer type of zupport zat may end up beink necessary!"

"Und I vould be only too happy to do so, mein liebling," Charlotte said gently. "So, vat are you doink for zis curative process?"

"Vell, first I vill reqwire assurances from zer pair of you zat you vill be followink mein instructions to zer letter."

"Of course, Doktor," zhey chorused.

"No matter how unusual it may at first be seemink."

"Of course, Doktor."

"Or how it might involve simultaneously too much neoprene garmentry und yet somehow not qwite enough."

"Of course, Doktor."

"Echt klasse! Meine kleine Gelegentlichpelzigmädchen, meine kleine Funkelndeblutsaugermädchen, please be finishink your drinks und be accompanyink me to mein Responsezentrum post-haste! Zer sooner ve begin, zer sooner zer treatment plan vill be effective!"

Doktor Trollenfisch und zer four agents bounced out of zer booth und back to Responsezentrum Drei-Vier-Sieben, und zen zer Doktor's plan to treat Agent Ix's condition began in earnest. Zer four agents vorked in harmony to salve Ix's voes und make her be feelink deeply und personally satisfied. Zey began vizz zer Flickenbeanen, und followed zat up vizz zer Stonkingbiggenrackenjigglen, und zer final course - und medically speakink, zere could be beink no alternative - vas zer Rubberupundthoroughboinken, in vhich zer superhuman speed und strength of Agent Charlotte proved to be most useful, zough she did have to be reassured zat zer treatment vas necessary und technically legal as, courtesy of ein complex netvork of international treaties, Responsezentrum Drei-Vier-Sieben operated under zer auspices of zer Burkina Faso Subdepartment of Horizontal Greased-Veasel Tangos, und zerefore anyzink zat vas goink on in zer pool of (now refreshed) orange-flavoured jelly vas beink entirely above-board.

Eventually, all five agents made zeir vay back to Rudis, vere zer Hawaiian-themed decor und signs proclaiming it to be Andalite Karaoke Night told zer Aviator zat it vas beink ein Friday, und zerefore she owed Luxury ein tventy. (Tventy vhat, alas, ist beink unknown) Zey settled down in zer same booth as before, zough now Ix und Charlotte vere beink much closer to zeir newfound playmates.

"I... I vas havink not zer slightest notion zat I vas in such dire need of your help, mein Doktor," said Ix, whose speech vas beink most languid und relaxed now. "I cannot be thankink you enough."

"Nor can I," piped up Charlotte, "zo I am thinkink Agent Luxury ist havink zer many suggestions vhich involve zer chocolate trifle und zer beanbag chairs."

"Ach, meine kleine Gelegentlichpelzigmädchen, it vas beink zer very least I could be doink! Indeed, I should be beink thankful to you und to your partner for decidink to stay vizz us on ein permanent basis!"

At zis, Ix just blushed ein leetle bit und ran her finger over zer spiky pink surface of her new collar. "Vell, I never vant to feel zer vay I used to again. Und now I never vill."

Zer now-expanded Interlockenpolyculen chatted for ein bit, savourink zer atmosphere of closeness und zer feelink of extraordinarily tight latex in various different colours on zeir respective skins. Zat mood, zough, vas shattered vhen a small cough came from zer head of zer table.

"Vhat," said zer FicPsych representative, "ist goink on here?"

"Oh, Nurse Jenni!" Ix vas suddenly lookink hunted. "I vas not expectink to be seeink you here!"

"I am avare. I, however, vas expectink to be seeink you. Yesterday. Vhere vere you, mein leetle scamp?"

"I vas vith zer Doktor!"

"Hm. Und how do you feel about zer Doktor?"

Zere vas only going to be vun possible response to zat.

"Echt klasse!"

TO BE BEINK CONTINUDE AGAIN AGAIN!

Yeah, once I managed to decipher the German, this fic was fantastic.

Dangit Scrape! Why do you have to write stuff like this to outshine all the talentless hacks like myself? ;-)

Where it doesn't show the edit toolbar and more importantly who wrote it? I think I want to do a Fanfic World thing (since it's obvious you don't need permission to do so), but I have to use my school account which uses my real name, since the non-personal account I'm planning to make for this thing isn't up and running yet...

-Twistey

in the Discord

Here's the logs, which include the evidence:

---

Tomash - Today at 8:18 AM
Uh, so, having looked at the online list, @Moderator, I claim that @TooPurple ought be kicked from the chat for the following reason. Either:
1) @TooPurple is Toroll, and is therefore ban evading. Evidence for this is that their underlying username, aghwrg#9161, matches the pattern of usernames used by Toroll, and their server nick is set to a username Bram intends to use, which shows they're trying to stir up drama.; or
2) @TooPurple is Bram, who is still banned, which means that account has been created for ban evasion

Either way, there is strong evidence that someone (even if I don't know who) is evading their ban.
Maslab - Today at 8:19 AM
Hmmm
I agree
They have been kicked, but not banned
IF they wish to dispute that they can come back and message me

---

- Tomash

I don't know how to phrase this terribly well - thinking is confusing - but I definitely know that I do not want Bram back in here yet.

Last time this came up, I was the one to start the thread, because Bram contacted me and - after a few conversations - asked me to. And I was absolutely, positively terrified the entire time. A big part of it was that I love it here and would have been positively crushed if I had been asked to leave or unofficially shunned for that, but that was most certainly not all of it.

I will not say that Bram was taking advantage of how nice I can be, or how strongly I feel about helping people. I will freely admit to being something of a people-pleaser, but I very highly doubt that that was Bram's intention, and how would e know that it actually physically pains me, to one degree or another, to say the words "I can't help you"?

I gave Bram a chance to reasonably explain eimself to me without having to wade through everything everyone else had to say about eim, and then proceeded to ask other people for their versions of the story, because I believe in getting all sides of a story before passing any kind of judgement. (That belief goes a little ways out the window when I am contacted very late at night by a drunk person, though.)

What's really bothering me, I suppose, is exactly what Scape said: Bram has openly admitted to being manipulative. Now, I will be the first to admit that this is a touch hypocritical coming from me, because I am also a manipulative person-whose-parents-were-never-married. However, the distinction I'm making (and please do correct me if I'm wrong here) is that I know very, very well when to stop messing with people and get serious. I know when it's not okay to be the Chessmistress. And never, never, do I attempt to be manipulative when it's not a game. And I'm not entirely sure the same can be said about Bram - I'm actually fairly certain it can't be, or at least not without a modifier or two.

For the time being, I rest my case.

--Calliope

I think that abstentions shouldn't be added to denominator when computing the percentage of voters for or against something, but that should count towards quorum totals ("at least X people post"). From a quick check of Google and Wikipedia, it appears to be how a lot of places that vote on stuff do it.

The reason for this is that, if we count explicit "meh" votes as their category, we can create some really silly situations. For example, suppose that, on some question that isn't about cats (with the 60% vote threshold to change anything), one person votes "Yes" and everyone else posts "I like kittens (nm)". This makes the vote pass, under the current rules. However, if everyone else instead posted "I abstain (nm)", the vote fails. This feels really weird.

In practice, this means that X unanimous people can be X people who either vote for/against something or explicitly abstain, as long as there's someone in there who actually had an opinion.

- Tomash

I was walking into Rudis when I noticed Nume sitting at a corner table. I walked over. "Hi", I said.

"Hi", He said back. He looked mad and sad.

"Are you okay?", I asked.

"Yea", He said and I smiled. "Aw, it's okay, you don't have to lie to me. I'm sorry if I upsetted you when I slept with Jacques but he was so hot and I couldn't help myself"

"I'm not hot?", He said and I laughed.

"You are but I'm not and I'll never be good enough for you", I sayed sadly and began to cry long tears of sad.

"Jessa you are perfect", Nume said taking my tiny small delicate flower hand in his strong big chiseled ones

I couldn't believe it and I ran out of the room crying because he was lying to me!!!

AN: Oh wow, isn't that sad? Poor Jessa! True love is soooo hard.

Since that text was rather concerning, I went through the edit history to figure out when in was added and by who. It was added in the following edit, which was (barring account takeovers) made by ... Bram. At that link, the left column is the text of the previous version, while the right text is the version introduced by the edit in question (which shows the paragraph under discussion was added in that revision).

- Tomash

In my capacity as someone who probably got (and continues to get) more lifelines than they probably should have, I understand how important a second, third, fourth, fifth, and eleventy-squillion-and-sixth chance can be. I also understand how they can feel to the person who gets them; to me, they always felt like a way out of a stupid situation that I'd gotten into because of my comprehensive inability to control either my depression, my anxiety, or my anger. Believe me when I tell you how much I understand the importance of having a community to support you, not as therapists but as friends with a shared interest.

So why on God's green Earth am I still voting for this block?

I don't know Bram all that well, but I remember the fallout from their being here before - both as Bram and as zdimensia (hey, remember that?). I remember Bram saying outright that they manipulate people as a matter of course, and that they did so to Neshomeh in order to be allowed back into the PPC in the first place. That's what rubs me up the wrong way about all this - the history of known manipulation and deceit on Bramandin's part. That's also what gives me pause about Bram's request for a mediator/mentor/parole officer/whathaveyou - it's a good idea in theory, but in practice I doubt its efficacy given Bram's history of self-admitted manipulation.

I'm also not a fan of some of the phrasing in the request. Bram states explicitly that any potential mentors must "attempt to explain how her actions differ from apparently identical actions taken by other Boarders" should the need arise. Frankly? That sounds like sour grapes. It sounds like someone who still thinks "But Thorin Oakenshield did it" is actually an argument. It sounds like someone who, instead of admitting when they're wrong and apologising, even if they don't necessarily mean it, will dig in their heels and cause yet more enormously derailed threads full of squabbling and discontent.

I don't think we need that any more.

The "Edit" respective "Edit profile" button at the top of an article is actually a combo box; so, if you cclick on the tiny down-arrow at the right end of the button, you may select "History". It then shows you a list of all changes with date and user name. At the top of this list, there is a button to "Compare selected revisions" which will show you what changed between versions selected in the vertical radio sets.

HG

Can someone with more knowledge of the wiki let me know if there is a way to get timestamps and users who made edits? The second to last paragraph bothers me. Namely the "excuse for a human being" phrase. That's not an okay thing to write.

As for the ban/unban issue I'll come back to it after I think on it for a bit.

At the time of Bramandin's ban, multiple people accepted Tomash's proposal that Bramandin be banned until 'receipt of a request that indicates some (not necessarily massive, but more than tiny, unless that's all that's needed) improvement in Bramandin's ability to interact with the PPC'. To further quote Tomash: 'I'm proposing this modification because, when you have a cast on, you can't take it off just because you feel like your bone isn't broken anymore.'

I feel that this requirement should be borne in mind when considering whether to unblock Bramandin.

---

On the technical front, the Nameless Admin will enact an unblock under the following circumstances:

1/ At least one week has passed since this thread was posted.
2/ The discussion has clearly ended, with no additional opinions in 48 hours.
3/ At least 60% of those giving an opinion vote for an unblock.

If at least 60% are voting explicitly for a continued block, the block will continue. Any other result will lead to a request for more opinions. Explicit abstensions (eg, Tomash's post) will be counted as a 'third party vote', ie, they count as part of the 100%, but not as either 60%. Simply not giving an opinion (eg, my post here) does not count as a vote.

The three requirements will be ignored if at least 15 people post in the first 48 hours, with a 60% majority voting for unblock and no votes for a continued block. This will be subject to identity verification by IP, and confirmation that no off-Board collusion was involved.

Any of these rules may be changed by request of at least 6 non-banned Boarders unanimously, or by a 50% majority of Boarders voting on the issue.

I'm sorry to come over all legalistic, but I flat-out refuse to allow any uncertainty in what the Nameless Admin will and won't do here.

hS

that I should link Bram's wiki user page, which contains a lot of her versions of the events of the past few years.

- Tomash

And yes, you may. This should be interesting. ^_^

~Neshomeh

Bramadin would like to be unblocked from the Board and the rest of the PPC, since it's now September and she feels that she's ready to come back and has been for a while. She's willing to work with anyone who volunteers to be a mentor and mediate disputes or tell her to back off. She has made clear that said mentor(s) need to be willing to consider her point of view and attempt to explain how her actions differ from apparently identical actions taken by other Boarders.

---

Per the terms of the block/ban/what have you, we need to vote on this. For my part, I abstain for lack of an ability to reach a decision.

On the for unblock side, discrimination because of mental illness is bad, and we might just be inching close. The proposal was for an indefiinite-but-temporaly ban, and this is the agreed-on effective minimum term. Bram has thought she's ready to participate again, which is still an important datapoint. And she does seem willing to work with people on social stuff should that come up.

On the against side, I'd cite significant interpretation issues, mainly of [people in the] community's actions and norms. A lot of said extremely atypical interpretations can be found in the thread where ban #2 was formalized in the first place. They're still around, more or less, from what I've heard. This is evidence against the idea that the whole pile of drama that led to this vote won't repeat itself in the future. (See, for example, something of an insistence that a decent amount of what happened on 2014 was somehow provoked by us because we apparently insisted she not use her preferred agent team for Permission requests.) There's also the fact that (to use RFC words) "You SHOULD NOT write large amounts of missions without Permission." just hasn't gotten through. In summary, I'm not quite convinced we aren't about to put ourselves right back where we were a few months ago, although I'm less certain about that than I was a while ago.

- Tomash

Tomash, Neshomeh, email me when you have the time?

Also, (yes, this is a link to Plurk; I don't generally use it for PPC stuff, though), I went through all the M-rated fics for Young Wizards on ffnet, and I was wondering which of the ones I complained about are actually missionable/MSTable? So I'd just like to talk about that, when you can.

Also, if you don't mind my asking: may I request your permission to use Jenni in a future chapter of CHRONICLES OF ZER BIGGENBRASSENPORKENTHINGEN? If nothing else, it's only polite to ask. =]

Name: Calls herself Estrelya Chara. Hates to admit that her real name is Annie Lynn.

Age: 16

Chosen Race: Togruta

Description: A young Togruta girl with crimson skin, ivory markings on her face and her four lekku, and sapphire-colored montrals that curve into a vague heart-shape. Her eyes have the look of gorgeous, polished emeralds, and are very quick to notice details.

Can most often be seen in flowing robes in various shades of blue or purple. That is, she would if the OFU would let her, and she's not very good at not tripping in them.

Weapon of Choice (this wasn't actually on the application but she filled it out anyway): A special staff, one end of which paralyzes any machinery it touches, and the other end emits a cutting laser (no, she doesn't actually have any training with this thing- she just made it up for a story of hers).

Lust Object (if applicable): Anakin Skywalker (Darth Vader counts too- she just loves redemption arcs)

Light Side/Dark Side: Was a jedi, before leaving the order as it was growing too stagnant. Currently a grey jedi, but holds to the principles of the light regardless.

Notes:

Enjoys bringing up (and incidentally totally misunderstanding) minor details from canon.

Her badfics, when they're not the standard 'Here Comes the Sue, Watch as She Shoehorns Herself Into Canon', are often redemption stories or attempts to flesh out backstory and lore. Actually sticking with what previous writers have established is secondary.

Has a tendency to make every protagonist (including her description of herself on the OFU application) the special-est of all special snowflakes.

In real world, she's a rather short, pudgy redhead who wears glasses (too much time writing in front of a computer screen) and only wishes she had green eyes. They're actually gray.

She's currently an alien because she didn't take the OFU application seriously (she thought it was just going to be a fun online roleplay) and wrote her idealized Star Wars self into it. She was rather surprised when she discovered that she was turned into a Togruta, and had to learn how to be one from scratch.

Enjoys wearing a golden Togruta montral-dress she made herself (it's actually just craft paper and cardboard, painted gold).

I demand that this be read aloud and recorded for posterity. Yes, demand. All of it. All present and future installments, in full. Some art is meant to be performed, and this qualifies. And if it causes anyone physical injury from literally busting a gut, well, that is the price we pay for epic comedy. {= D

~Neshomeh