The PPC Posting Board - Latest posts

She seems like an interesting character. I'll bookmark that other one too. Yay!

Sue VS Sue isn't the only game I'm going to make, but it's probably going to be one of the first, since a side-view platformer would be easier to code than most other things I've got planned. I'm also going to do a few animations - in fact, the reason I started posting to the board was to ask about an animated series set in the PPC continuum, starring two characters who function as "fanfic's hired mercenaries". (My parents don't like this group, so I gotta lie low. :P)

Anyway, I don't have much else to say. Looking forward to hearing your reply.

-Twistey

Skarmory, I can't quite remember exactly what went on between you and Bram. Other than going off on me for being self-diagnosed, and I should re-read what you actually said and what I actually said.

I invite you to talk to me and be vulgar. We may fight and hurt each other's feelings, but I won't take it personally if you won't.

I did comment for help. I'm just pointing out the two times out of three that I could have done something more. I said more later, mostly when explaining why I was writing without permission.

That's mostly the myth of zdimensia. Something was said to her, she responded, if there was any reply at all it was TLDR she must be trolling.

There was one more thing that never occurred to me, other than lying. I could have gone "Screw what little feedback I got from the PG, I'm going to ignore it and do what I want."

I'm not arguing that I needed to step back. I'm arguing that I volunteered to step back and they felt I needed to be punished for that.

Sorry for mentioning BSDM. I draw parallels to try and understand the world. Are the song references bad, as well?

I still don't understand how I am to blame for the actions of other people. While there were things that I could do, they could have done more.

I'm rising to my condition, which unfortunately means that I must go against what I think is proper and just be direct, even if that isn't proper either.

I was witness to what happened during Bram's first attempt at Permission, while it was happening in real-time and certainly not after the fact. Granted, I did mess up big-time by yelling at her, but looking back at the thread I can say that she wasn't a victim necessarily. I appreciate that her mental health concerns are being discussed in a civil, tactful fashion, but constantly arguing back when faced with concrit, or ignoring it as has been done with the missions they've published, is still not a good thing to do.

I've had PM correspondence with this person before, and the response I got to my apology for lashing out at them was that she tried to shift the blame to the rest of the community. She hasn't once apologized to me for the things she's done wrong, and has instead tried to justify herself for their actions, which is something that my work supervisors have advised against doing because it makes me look like I can't take criticism. I don't speak with her often through PM, and I can't remember the last time I've done so, but I just don't want to have to willingly put myself in a situation where I may end up snapping and causing another ruckus, because Arceus knows I've been through enough of those. :/

As it stands, I wish to vouch for a final chance to give the olive branch to Bram, a last call for her to either make an honest effort to better herself as a person or, as has been stated multiple times in this thread, part ways with us without another ugly incident, which is more likely given the state of things. I know I called for her to be temporarily banned straight away that time, but if that were the case then I'd have just as easily been given the boot as well for my own offense back then, and in light of this recent info I don't know if another temporary ban would be successful. Whatever the case, I hope she gets the help she needs with her mental issues, because that'd likely be more productive than arguing on the Internet with the odds so badly stacked against her...

But if you are viewing, and to bring up two of your main points, the banning and the Permission process as oppressive, then there is still an issue.

Events reached a point where a ban was needed. When the vast majority of people participating in a discussion have a serious enough problem with the discussion that they're asking someone to leave, that's not oppression. That is a sign that a large portion of the community has an issue with what you are saying or doing, and would like you to stop because the area is for them to enjoy as much as it is yours. To put it bluntly, while you enjoying the community is important, so is everyone else enjoying it, and if one person is making it difficult for a larger group of others, then that one has the problem, not the group at large.

As for permission, you mentioned that you had issues with the permission prompts and your characters, but didn't comment for help. When people pointed out difficulties, you said it would have been better to have lied about what characters you were going to use, as long as you could use the ones you wanted. This is not the fault of the community.

That in all of these cases, you rest the blame either on others or on the community as a whole is why I don't think you've really learned. I understand that there are issues you have to overcome, bus as Scape said in the previous discussion, you can't use your own condition as a crutch.

I'm sorry if this feels like an attack, but this is truly how the situation is coming across to me. The reference to BDSM was entirely unneeded and insulting, depending on where you fall on the subject.

I'm just saying what I feel would be best, but you're you and thus the best judge of what is ultimately the best thing for you to do. So go for it.

Nope, that's not me. I don't even know how to block people on gmail.

It's reasonable to say she can't interact before issues are resolved.

I think, also, that Scape should give us a plan for how she plans to address the accusations that she lashes out.

Where in the TOS does it say that I have to put up with being treated unfairly and keeping quiet about it?

"Anger cries Under American Skies." Another Tom Paxton one. Very NSFW.

I don't think that I'm asking you to bend over backwards, more like reasonable accommodation.

The constitution already says that if you don't know what someone means, or think it's an insult, you should ask them.

Dealing with me, just be aware that I'm autistic and be plain about what you expect from me.

What I'm seeing is that I should bow down to those who would oppress me. That I should not hold a grudge for you grinding me down needlessly.

I was reading a bit about "submissive space" in BDSM. I don't get it, except that I should find peace and power in being controlled and beaten?

Look up Tom Paxton, We Didn't Know. It is NSFW, especially if you find that one video. The pictures of people playing guitar are slightly safer, but bad language.

I still don't feel how much self-reflection makes your mistakes my fault.

Maybe I shouldn't have lashed out, but know that I had little recourse, I felt.

The spirit of the ban may have been self-reflection, but that isn't quite the attitude I've seen. Sure, there's been plenty of reviewing of your action, and the actions of others, but as you've shown in this thread, you haven't learned from what happened. The fact that the temporary ban had to be changed to a permanent one, which you still did everything in your power to get around, proves that things have not changed.

The fact that every other post in this thread from you contains accusations at other members of the board is not reassuring in the slightest.

Maybe I'm wrong about this. Maybe others have a different view of it than I do, but from what I've seen, I don't think anything has really changed.

The point I wished to express was this:

I would say that there is a strong argument to be made that zdimensia/Bramandin is in violation of her ban. Like hS said, she was banned indefinitely after breaking the terms of her initial ban. That's what happens. That's what's supposed to happen. If you agree to T&Cs and don't abide by them, you have to accept the consequences.

I also agree with doctorlit; the PPC can help as a support network, but it can't be a therapist. This person needs help, quite seriously, and we're not equipped to give it in a fit and proper manner. It's simply not fair on us to have to act as translators for people's mental issues, and I say that as someone who (as I believe I've told you before) suffers from a litany of them myself. I find them extremely difficult to deal with: my depression is like being chained to a flat, grey rock, slowly turning through the depths of space; my anger is like a red-hot cannonball sitting in the pit of my stomach, boiling the blood around it; the two combine in exciting and sometimes explosive ways.

I'm getting better.

You can, and you should, and you should because you can.

Thanks, your review does give insight.

The woman is actually my most-used character. She has a spell that makes her "actively defy description" which means that people don't really notice what she looks like beyond their expectations. I also felt that she would be recognized here, but mostly it is the spell.

Daniel, or Larry as he was originally, has always suffered a bit from cardboard characterization. Long story, but part of that is from his meta origins and I'm hoping it will go away as a I work with him. Right now he's on the spectrum. He's supposed to be friendly, I'll dial that up a bit.

I was actually thinking more about the ventilation plotholes and how there might be infestation. I was thinking that the pollen problems might be caused by the bosses, though. My headcanon is that they're normally winding ductwork, but there still is the problem of cross-contaminating different worlds with invasive species.

I also think that anyone with a decent bookshelf has micro-fissures going into Library space, but that would mean that most of Headquarters smells like old books.

I have seen a PPC story, somehow Doctor Who shows up during the blackout I think. They described the hallways of the PPC cutting through the Screaming shack and Minecraft tunnels.

I need to rewrite this more with Larry as the focus.

I'm feeling better than I have in a long time. Even being Bramandin, before anyone else knew, I felt better to be talking to you.

I might leave once the wounds have healed.

Barring any honestly despicable behavior from me, I feel that I should be able to come and go as I please. That includes refraining from posting when I'm stressed.

Were you the one who told me "the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few" before blocking me out for unintentional rudeness?

Keep in mind that zdimensia the malicious troll is a myth. Your interpretation of what I was thinking does not do me justice. Instead, you had a confused retard that was feeling attacked at every turn, and either hesitating or not understanding what to do.

Where you pointed out a direct request, I thought that Neshemeh was flame-baiting me. I would have responded somewhere along the lines of "I have said two times already what I was planning to do. That you're asking proves that you are incapable of listening."

---

What was the spirit of the ban? If it was for self-reflection, that was accomplished.

If it was to punish, it accomplished that. Again, you were punishing a myth.

If it was to turn me into an angry and uncontrollable monster. If it was to make me vulnerable enough that one final push would bully me into killing myself. Yeah, it needed another two months.

---

Playing the tape forward, if I hadn't tried to contact you when I did... I would have come back in the fall, accused you of being abusive, if not banned then, I would have insisted I had permission.

Or perhaps I would have wised up and come back as a new person like Bramandin.

I didn't know you wrote, but if you ever do get writing!involved here, I'll be excited to read your work!

I know better than to ask for a full list, but what are some of your main fandoms? :)

~Zing

It's amazing learning about what audiences do and don't notice, and the differences between the performer's perspective and theirs. I love the experience of finding out. Glad it appeared to go well! :)

Was there a particular occasion for the group performance?

~Zing

I've read over everything I can get my hands on, the archives, Nesh's email conversations, even my emails with you to see if I could get anything else from them. I honestly do not believe it would a good idea for you to stay in this community Bramandin, not because you are not good for this community, but because it is becoming increasingly obvious to me that this community is not good for you. That is not an attack against either you or anyone in this community, but I think a mutual parting of ways is the best outcome for this situation.

Novastorme

I have a feeling the Nazi thing is a misinterpretation of an incomplete thought. I think that so much is focused on Nazis automatically being evil that we don't focus on what's under the surface.

I do admit that I don't have as great of an understanding of racism as I should after all this time. I did reflect on it, and I'm not done.

Neshome cannot be my mediator. I blamed her carelessness for my downfall. I forgive you.

For what it's worth, I apologize again for being so forceful in email. Someone else should have been brought in on the secret.

I would like to bury the hatchet. After all, we have fandoms in common.

I was told very firmly not to talk about it from a moment on, so I wasn't even allowed to apologize or explain myself.

I'm not a racist. Well, there is unintentional othering, but no moral judgments about who is better or that one group should be held to different standards.

I had some confirmation bias about those who scowled. It's since been broken. I haven't had the courage to ask a scowler why they're doing it, and have stopped looking at people. If I wasn't all but forced to live here, I wouldn't.

I did once explain that I thought I had a red R floating over my head. The actions of others don't make me anything.

I'm sorry for connecting the feelings of shame that I wasn't being listened to here for the feelings of shame that I was being scowled at.