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That link was inappropriate, and I appreciate being called out on it.

From what you all are saying, it seems like better communication between the individuals involved could easily solve the problem without kicking Sprinkles from the Discord. Luckily, this can happen! I implore the person noted here (whoever it is) to get in touch with Sprinkles, and try to explain their side of the story and re-establish good terms with him.

I think it's a sane thing to attempt, at least. What's the harm?

I'm not asking for detail. I'm not asking for a steaming pile of drama. Just for a quick, concise explanation of what he actually did to make you so mad, because once we know what we're dealing with, we can make a rational, informed decision.

It would be best to solve this quickly and cleanly. Then drama wouldn't be happening - mysteries make for back-stabbing.

No matter what the circumstances, in my mind? That just wasn't okay. On any level.

Having been over the past few weeks in communication with Sprinkles via PMs, I would have to agree. Had I, being in a similar situation, asked him to stop, I find it hard to believe that he wouldn't have stopped. What I've seen of him so far is attuned to the wishes of other people, and tries his best not to bother us with his own issues. Following that statement, I would like to present Sprinkles' point of view on the matter: According to him, Delta's member of the community had told him multiple times that they were okay with his issues, and had generally worked to love and support him through his emotional trials. Following his recent outburst, they completely cut contact with him without offering an explanation, or (to my knowledge) having issued warnings to him about his behavior. My own interactions with him have made it abundantly clear that he is beyond devastated because of this.

Yeah, it's more than a bit much. It's a solidly extreme example, and I only linked it because Clif explains it better than I could with half-frozen fingers on a phone keyboard. I am sorry for the implications it raised.

But I do think that he seriously needs to get help with his issues, assuming he hasn't already. (He probably has, but... I don't know. Sprinkles?)

Okay, I can't make a judgement about this. I don't know anything. I don't know if the individual in question informed Sprinkles that what he was doing made them uncomfortable (that's important: there's a difference between not knowing that you're bothering someone, and knowing but doing it anyways). I don't even know what he did.

I understand that you cannot reasonably give us that information, but it does mean that I can't do much with what you gave me.

I have to judge Sprinkles on my observations of his behavior, and on what I know. And for the most part, he's been a very good member of the PPC community from what I have seen. I think he has some issues (Sprinkles, I assume you're reading this... Please, get some help if you haven't already. I don't know how capable you are of getting help, but if you can, you need to), but fundamentally, his heart is in the right place, and he's mostly a great guy.

If I knew what happened in PMs, that may change my opinion. I don't know. But a vague charge that he did something in PMs with no indication that there are not other options aside from booting him to mitigate this (like, say, talking to Sprinkles and sorting it out) doesn't change my position. Booting, even from chat, is a fairly extreme action.

Finally, there's something about Delta's post that really bugged me: It's the link to the Missing Stairs post. Delta, I feel that providing that post in the context you did severely overstates Sprinkles' issues. Not only that, but as posted, it seems to indirectly compare Sprinkles to a rapist. Sprinkles is by no means a perfect human being, but the issues we are discussing are not anywhere near that serious. That link makes it seem like you are implying that Sprinkles is Totally Broken, Evil, or both: neither is accurate, in my opinion.

I don't think that's what you meant to do by linking that post, but that is how it came across, to me at least.

I get that you're on phone and can't keep up otherwise. But still... I think this is a magnitude or more away from rape.

I think I get the gist of what you're trying to say here, but that's a bit much, don't you think? Sprinkles is a good friend of mine and a good person. I along with several other people heavily disapprove of comparing him to a freaking criminal.

I know who it is that was having this abuse flung at them. And e kept telling Sprinkles he was okay. There is no doubt in my mind that Sprinkles would have stopped if asked to - he's since offered several times with me.

I am writing this from my phone, so please excuse the brevity and inevitable typos- I will spend more time once I have my full keyboard again.

If it was just the New Year's Eve meltdown? I'd be right there with you. He posted in the middle of a meltdown, didn't even attack anyone in particular, and has apologized to at least Akrinor. I'd be cool with a "don't do that again," and probably some talk via pms on how to recognize when he shouldn't be posting.

But.

I've heard from a member of the community who offered to help Sprinkles that he has been throwing significant amounts of abuse at them in PM for multiple months, to the point that they've suffered a lot of distress. I've also heard corroboration from other people- I really trust what I've heard about Sprinkles's behavior.

I'm sorry I'm being vague- some of the people I am talking to are not comfortable being named in this conversation, and I'm trying to respect that. I'm also not sure how much their identities matter- Sprinkles has been taking out his issues on people in painful ways, and I'm not comfortable with that in my community.

At this point, I'd like to ((say something here that I've rightly been called out for. Removed it.))

To add to that- I do not intend to block him from contacting me. But, that does not mean I am comfortable having him in a space where he has already made people uncomfortable speaking up about how he is hurting them.

Sprinkles has been an amazing friend to me ever since I've known him. He's an amazing guy, both highly supportive and fun to talk to in general. He's expressed to me so many times how deeply sorry he is about his outburst, and I have absolutely no reason to believe that he had control over it in any regard. I also think it's highly unlikely for a meltdown on the gen chat to happen again. I honestly think it's unfair to shut him out for something that essentially wasn't him at all, and I for one would look forward to his return to the chat.

Fair enough.

This message is meant to be general. There shouldn't be any issue with it, and nitpicking is not useful or wanted. Use as much clarity as you feel will get your message across unfettered and unaltered.

A forced shift of personality. Very unlikely to happen again in PPC group chat.

I personally don't have a problem with this, but GEEMA raises a valid point. If this was a re-occurring problem with an individual, I could see the argument, but since as far as I can tell, this was the first time with him, I think it is important that we, as a community, help each other out. Honestly, I was not there when this happened, so I was kind of confused at first, but from what I can tell, it was just someone going through a rough time who couldn't deal with it any more and kind of exploded. Ultimately, I think he should be allowed back.

We will be mature and respectful of other people's opinions. You may disagree with some people and that's alright - but you still have to respect their opinions on this topic, as their voice should be heard, regardless of the person.

I am reminding people of this because some people believe that their voice will be silenced due to their previous opinions in debates and arguments completely unrelated to this, and that they would be written off due to their previous sentiments. This should not, and will not be the case here.

Sprinkles wants to come back because he loves this group and its people. He had no intent of hurting anyone - at the time, he was affected by what we've agreed to call a forced shift of personality.

Physically, he was at the keyboard, yes. Mentally? Not so much.

We've already determined - rightfully so - that mental issues don't excuse people from being plain awful. But they do need to be taken into consideration in cases like this.

Additionally, Iximaz never have a reason for objecting to Sprinkles coming back. I know the reason, at least in general terms, because I've been talking to both of them (though I have talked to Sprinkles much, much more about this), but the fact that he wasn't willing to say why he objected to the group at large speaks volumes to me.
It's also entirely possible that nobody asked and he would have been willing to say why if someone had - which is why I'm asking now, in this discussion, what exactly his reason was. Why, Ix?

--Cal

It's important to note that a few other people did object to bringing Sprinkles back. As I understand it, nobody thinks that he's a bad person or should be banned in the traditional sense (i.e. for bad behavior). The concern is that it's a huge emotional drain on everyone when someone, anyone, has a meltdown like that--not only because the things said were potentially harmful, but because we're worried about Sprinkles' own well-being.

Speaking for myself, I have no objections to bringing Sprinkles back, but I do want to see him get the kind of support and help that he needs to feel better about himself even at his low points. I'm not sure that we can offer that. Of course we can be friends, but there's only so much a username and some text on the Internet written by a stranger can do for self-esteem.

I realize I'm rambling, so I'll stop. I just wanted to provide a little more context to the situation as I saw it, and anyone can obviously correct me if I misread something.

Last night, Mr Sprinkles asked me in PM on Discord whether people would be okay with him returning to the PPC Discord.
To those who do not know, since he joined, Mr Sprinkles was very active on the Discord, and, in my opinion, a great member of the PPC. On New Year's Eve, he had what appears to be a major meltdown, and said several things I'd prefer not to repeat here, that generally boiled down to "You don't matter to me.", "My existence is meaningless.", "You don't know the real me." and "You are lying when you say that you care about me.". The meltdown ended with him leaving the server on his own (He was not kicked as far as I know). After a while, he apparently asked Cal via PM to pass on his apology and that he was feeling slightly better, which she did.
Mr Sprinkles came back a few hours later for a short period of time, to positive reactions from those who were online at the time. He again apologized for what had happened, and left again shortly after, due to needing a break from the PPC after what had happened.
Yesterday evening, he asked me whether I would be willing to poke the server about whether people would be okay with him coming back. I did so, and the initial reaction was positive, until Ix objected, without declaring any reasoon for doing so. After that the chat dissolved into discussion, and due to the issue being serious, and the suggestions of some people in the chat, I'm bringing the issue to the Board.
My personal opinion: In the PMs with me, Sprinkle has apologized multiple times over, and (as far as I can tell) deeply regrets what happened. From what he told me it also transpired that he apparently was not entirely in control of his actions at the time, which he described to me in later PMs as feeling like "a forced shift in personality" and an "alternate personality forcibly taking over".
I'd be happy to have him back anytime.
~Ak
PS: Something important to note is that he was never banned,and that to my knowledge noone even publicly proposed any kind of ban against him.

So, I got out of Star Wars an hour or so ago, and I have a few opinions.

I liked:
- The complex, less black-and-white storyline
- That still ended on a high note
- The lack-of-sound and several mostly-snapshots effect. That was a neat thing
- The fact that they managed to make it feel like the movie was over several times, only to "but wait, there's more" me
- The porgs. They were cute

I didn't like:
- The fact that they didn't go with Poe/Finn. It is was 2017, would it've killed them to add one gay ship?

Overall, very good, would recommend

- Tomash

Merry Christmas to you to, Whitey,
The second "to" should be "too".

Also, I agree with doctorlit that "avoid" would work better than "avert". "Avert your eyes!" may be very loosely associated with "Avoid to look at me/this/whatever!", but its meaning is actually closer to "Turn/look away!" At least that’s what I get when I translate it to German and then back to English, and this is probably why Backslash just barely managed to avert her gaze implies that Backslash redirects Whitney’s gaze rather than his own.

HG

AN: Right! I basically used this prompt as an excuse to have a bit of "fun" with some ideas I've had around for a little while. I did my best to ensure this makes canonical sense for 40k, but facts about Prospero are light on the ground, and I am bad at research. So I didn't have a ton to work with. OTOH, I didn't have a ton of constraints, either. I'm mostly worried I screwed something I don't know about up, but I don't think I did.

Thank you to Nesh for making some very helpful suggestions that made this story a lot better, to 'Plith for helping double-check that it makes canon sense, and to, Quincy, Granz, and Calliope for giving it a once-over and checking to ensure I hadn't lost my mind, at least from a people-not-overly-familiar-with-40k-canon-who-just-want-a-neat-story perspective.

With that over with, on to the story proper:
~~

“I don’t know if you ever will. But if so... it won’t be like this. I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t believe it, at first. That you were really going. I had the utmost faith in you, but—”

“No. You thought I would fail.”


“Kann—”

“Don’t deny it. I can see it, clear as day.”

“Kann, please.”

“There’s no shame in your lack of belief. It’s rare for anyone to be chosen. And I’m far from perfect. You, of all people, would know that. To have that faith in me would have made you a fool.”

[Pause]

“Why are you doing this to me, Kann?”


“...Because I’m afraid, Erek. I’m terrified of leaving you. And maybe if I pretend I can’t feel it, the pain will stop.”

“I understand that, I think. But… please. Stop trying to hurt me. Because I can see how much it’s tearing you up. And I’m afraid too.”

“You have little to fear.”

“I’m about to lose you.”

“You’ll find someone else.”

“Not you.”

“...No. Not me.”

“Kann… don’t go. Not yet. I want you with me.”

“I leave at daybreak. Until then...”

“Until then, we are together?”

“Of course. For as long as I can manage.”

[...Time Passes...]

“This really is the end then.”

“I have to go. I don’t want to, but I have to.”

“It is an honor, I suppose.”

“Being chosen to serve the Emperor… it is the greatest honor. But sometimes, I wonder if it’s worth giving you up. Not that I could turn it down if I wanted to.”

“...I love you, Kannan.”

“And I love you, Erek.”

“Should I ever see you again… will you at least greet me?”

“Of course, Erek. If I can, I’ll do that for you.”

---

“Thoth?”

The Thousand Son now known as Thoth looked up. “What is it you wish, Tom?”

Tom took his head out of his book to look at his partner. “I was just wondering… what was it like, being chosen to be a Space Marine?”

Thoth was silent for a moment. “I was more than a boy, at least. Many are chosen to join the Astartes sooner than I was. Although the training in my powers had begun long before that, as it did for all children gifted with such things upon Prospero.” There was another pause. “I began my training, and I left my life behind. That is what you do, when you are chosen.”

“Did it hurt? Leaving your home?”

“...No,” Thoth said. For a brief instant, Tom thought he saw a hint of… something in the marine’s eye. Sadness, or regret, maybe. But it could have just been a trick of the light.

~~
Disclaimers: Thoth, Tom, and Erek are mine, The Laundry Files belongs to Charles Stross (it never really shows up here, but Tom's from there... just being safe), Warhammer 40k, Prospero, The Thousand Sons, and so on belong to Games Workshop, and the PPC, of course, belongs to Jay and Acacia, in the trust of the PPC Board and the PGs held therein.