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Though the Higurashi one to "Miss Lucy Had Some Leeches" was pretty good. Reminds me, I've gotta have Molly sing that song and worry everyone by NOT asking what the subverted rhyme words are.

I'm still wondering if the "Chimbley Sweep" fanvid makers paid attention to the third verse where the, er, metaphor is made explicit. I feel so bad for liking that song because of the subject matter, but the tune is ridiculously cheerful and addictive. One day I'm going to get caught singing it and have an embarrassing explanation ahead of me.

I think so. If you had a Sue that was entirely in another part of the world, not interacting with the canon, it would be possible. For instance, a Harry Potter Sue who was in a school in, say, South America who was perfect, talented, angsty, beautiful, and had all the boys falling over her, but didn't break any established rules of how wizardry works, would still be a Sue but not touch canon.

Why a Suethor would come up with this I can't imagine.

Think Molly might have to come along? She might be a bit young for the meetings, but she was rescued from a badfic.

Because my agents are going to be in Improbable AU (whenever I actually get to write about them... things are getting in the way), I was going to ask just this question! Also, how the missions work. I read a bit of despatch and thought it sounded similar: the canon has to be neuralized and portalled back to wherever he/she belongs.

I like the question mark a lot, second the mirror (not sure how you'd put it on, though), but not the other three. I guess maybe the coin. I don't have ideas myself.

Please make sure I don't get left out of this, because whenever I can write (soon I hope), this will be my department!

The first is delicious... the second...
well, that one is probably NSFW.

I found this while doing research on Quenya/Sindarin for the mission I'm currently working on, as the Sue doesn't use either, but I wasn't sure if there were bits that she was using, if that makes any sense at all. Just look under "phrasebooks", and then "Insults". There's also a list of curses in the Black Speech, the language of the Orcs.

As for non-Tolkien curses, here's a good (and rather funny) site, though probably NSFW.

Orion, who was rescued from a Harry Potter badfic. At the moment his personality's still settling down, but it looks like he'll probably be a) slightly skittish around people he doesn't know, b) not up for Sue killing, which is why he'll eventually be ending up in Bad Slash with a new agent I'm currently working on, and c)will, once he gets to know people (basically, after two or three times of actually, y'know, talking to them), be quite happy to carry on a conversation with them and actually interact with them without someone telling him to.

Feel free to use him as you like.

If you want a simple image, two lightning bolts--for the phrase "lightning strikes twice in the same place", meaning an extremely unlikely event. Of course, lightning does strike some places repeatedly (depending on elevation and location)--but improbable AUs are actually highly probable because there are so many badfic writers! I think it kinda fits.

A little like your balanced-on-edge coin, but doesn't take a 3-d image. And not so continuum-specific as the whale/petunias idea.

Note: this qualifies as part of the 'nattering on'

If you have any insults or curses in Quenya, German, Chinese, Ancient Hebrew, whatever, please donate some to my collection! It's completely free. So far I've gotten Sindarin, Japanese, Shakespearan English, and some Greek is pending. If you need one, ask.

I didn't post this as a new thread because I have a specific quota so I don't post too frequently and outrage people like I did first time.

Have one timed package of plastique for your trouble. : )

Agent Ithalond was recruited out of "Celebrian." He was a semi-random throwaway Elf that had his hands cut off and got to witness the Celebrian-duplicate jerking off the goblin king. He is . . . severely traumatized.

With that many errors of the same type, I suspect the story was originally written in first person, and then the author went back and changed it. Having done the same thing once, I know how hard it is to catch every pronoun. Not that that's an excuse. It really, really isn't.

~Neshomeh

Lest there be confusion, when you have a canon character who has been Sued, it's just as much a Sue as an OC Sue, and just as damaging to the continuum. Possibly moreso, even.

Distinction aside, though, I agree. {= )

~Neshomeh

I have a couple. Ilraen has adjusted well enough by now that he might conceivably be called upon to moderate such a meeting from time to time, though he'd be a little flustered and embarrassed to begin with. Nurse Jenni in FicPsych would absolutely put him up to it. Having some responsibility and dialogue with people other than his partner would be very good for him.

Derik, on the other hand, is a total basket case. He's moody, and often has abrupt mood swings to boot. He takes after his namesake Erik more than he realizes. Meetings like this might just keep him from totally flipping his lid.

Lemme know if you want more details.

~Neshomeh

My feeling is that time in HQ is relative to who you're talking to. The agents perceive it as linear because it's what they're used to, therefore missions happen one after the other, but because it actually isn't, Mission 1 can happen on Wednesday and Mission 2 can then happen the previous Monday. Years can go by in the span of a month if need be for basically the same reason. It's all due to plotholes/portal technology, not to mention the time spent in missions (which sometimes is like Narnia time, but sometimes isn't). I know Jay remarks at some point that if time worked normally, all the time spent in missions would mean that she was really old. But clearly that was not the case for her.

In my latest FicPsych story, I mention that the nurses are free to set their clocks however they like as long as they're on duty when they're supposed to be. It can be noon for you and 7:00 a.m. for the next person easily, depending on whether you're a morning person or not.

We didn't really start keeping track of "HQ time" until just a few years ago, and that was due to big events like Crashing Down and all the 2008 stuff. Aside from those things, and maybe noting what year it is, I don't think there's really any reason to bother with time except to say "this came first, this came second, this came a long time after the first thing," etc.

~Neshomeh

One of my agents is called Toon (no last name.) She was an Unused Idea that fell through a Plot Hole in a Torchwood fic on top of my other agent, and got dragged back to HQ. She would have been a Sue if she ever actually made it to being a character.
Toon's incredibly hyperactive and cheery, as well as hopelessly optimistic. She shares traits with the milder Mary Sues.

Here's the User one: link

And here's the Agent one: link

For users:

{{Infobox User
| Name = Namehere
| Username = Usernamehere
| Board Name = Boardnamehere
| Fandoms = fandomshere
| Agents = Agentshere
| Website Link = website here
| Date = Whenyoufoundtheppchere
}}

For Agents:

{{Infobox PPC Agents
|Name =
|Image = Placeholder.jpg
|Caption = Add your own image!
|Boarder's Name =
|Age =
|Species =
|Home Continuum =
|Department =
|Division =
|Response Center =
|Partner =
|Fandom(s) =
|Lust-object(s) =
|Favorite(s) =
|Weapon(s) =
}}

A Canon Sue is a sue that doesn't damage the continuum. She's integrated into the story, and the canon is in a sort of symbiosis with her, so she doesn't tear the continuum to bits but also can't take over more than what she's written to take over.

Yes, a Tenth Walker could fall in love with Legolas without being a Sue; but it would probably take more writing skill than the vast majority of writers have--including the published ones.

If a non-Sue changes canon, the story is simply an AU.

Jane is from Middle-Earth. She's a Random Dwarf who was saved from a dragon by a Mary Sue. Because the badfic writer never mentioned it, Jane intermittently does and does not have a beard, and when she does have one, it tends to change in shape and style. She's total Generic Dwarf--brown hair, brown eyes, short, stocky. At this point she's been in the PPC for about a month, and the big technology gap is both confusing and fascinating to her. As a result she's constantly researching both the continua and the basics of science. May be seen carrying around all kinds of books, including everything from the complete Harry Potter series to sophisticated tomes like "A Child's First Book of Electricity". Still uses a universal translator but can speak some English, though it's heavily accented. Her personality has begun to show itself as inquisitive, hard-working, and orderly. She speaks (through the translator) in a somewhat formal manner, loves coffee, and carries a set of three throwing axes on a belt. She has read the PPC handbook cover-to-cover and still sometimes forgets that always going by the book can be a Bad Idea.

She picked the name "Jane Doe" because when she was dragged into FicPsych by a couple of agents who found her, she was heavily tranquilized and woke up to hear a nurse calling her by that name. She subsequently adopted it because it worked as well as any other.

Jane is in the Floaters department, partnered with a former PPC janitor named Jason. She would probably be attending the meeting because she is trying to figure out how the multiverse works and gathering all the information she can possibly get her hands on.

How an assassin handles a Sue definitely reflects the assassin's personality. "Burn the witch" is not particularly good the fourth time around because it's become too generic to be truly ironic anymore. Many assassins have trademark weapons or execution strategies; others like to get creative with whatever the canon offers. When it comes to assassination style and strategy, a Federation security officer recruited from a "Star Trek" badfic is going to be very different from a sixteen-year-old OFUM graduate or a Middle-Earth mpreg baby who grew up in the Nursery...

Personally, I think that if it's not creative or original, then you're better off just shooting the Sue. Making fun of the badfic is the real meat of a DMS mission anyway; the execution itself doesn't generally take more than a paragraph to describe.