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The villain laughs. The heroine is at his mercy, head bowed, on her knees, in front of his dark throne. Smiling evilly, like all cliché villains, he snaps his fingers for his guards to take her down into the dungeons.

At this moment, she raises her head. There is a look in her eye, a resolute glint. The villain frowns but snaps his fingers anyway, which turns out to be the biggest mistake of his life.

She is wearing an oversized trench coat, which the villain pinned down as placing aesthetic over practicality. How very wrong he was. In that moment, he sees only ducks. Ducks, everywhere. The waterfowl stream from every single opening in her trench coat, quacking, pecking at the floor, flapping their wings, being ducks in general. The heroine smiles and snaps her fingers.

The next day has charming headlines such as: RESIDENT EVIL OVERLORD OVERWHELMED BY TSUNAMI OF DUCKS and DUCKS: THE NEW WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION??

The little old ladies sitting at a table seem to disagree over this. 'You can't mass-produce ducks, Margaret,' says one of them, sipping tea through her immensely complex straw. Margaret huffs and stares mutinously at her fried eggs.

Across the street, a woman in a comically long trench coat shrugs, shoving a webbed foot back into her sleeve.

My Oddlots archive preserves the dear old 'You are approximately visitor since this site was relaunched on March 12th 2003'. That text, complete with dead counter, greeted me when I first joined the PPC, and is where I got my idea of when the Board began.

But an ACTUAL launch date! That's incredible. I remember I theorised it had to be late October or so, based on the post numbers, but a specific date... wow. Well done! o

hS

The more ducks you can carry, the stronger you are. More ducks means more strength. A single Mallard duck can weigh up to 1.6 Kg. It would also mean that you can control Ducks and use them to Attack your enemies. After all, how do you carry them if they keep on quacking into your ears?

Edit: This may or may not be a sign that your agent is a Sue/Stu.

~SomeRandomPersonAccount

And I'm happy to pop in tomorrow morning, too, just in case? (Which means I'd better go to bed now!)

~Neshomeh

Jenni will carry all the ducks, because saving lost ducklings is kinda her thing, and also she's immortal and sorta nonlinear, so that helps. (She would also like to comment that: 1. Lux is a nice woman who is perfectly capable of carrying ducks. Probably not more than one at a time, but that's only because she's easily distracted, NOT whatever horrible things you people are thinking. 2. She's not sure Jacques quite got the point of the exercise—she thinks he can carry a lot of ducks and actually wishes he wouldn't sometimes. ... This IS a psychological metaphor of some sort, right?)

Henry can definitely carry a duck or two! Maybe even a few at once, once he gets really good at the Levitation Charm.

Simon is not quite four years old and is scared of the ducks. No, thanks!

Derik can carry a few ducks. He's theoretically strong enough to carry several ducks or more, but they wiggle, and feathers are slippery, and they bite, and it's harder than it looks, all right? Back off.

Gall is probably not allowed to carry ducks, because Fellrazer. But if she were, with a full-sized dragon to help, she would carry ALL THE DUCKS, because she's just that good. (Actual duck capacity: a few of her own, plus Derik's sometimes.)

Gadrik is not old enough to even think about carrying ducks.

Ilraen could acquire the DNA of a representative sample of the species and combine them into a single morph, and thus become the physical embodiment of all the ducks, but he's not sure that counts. Er, maybe just one duck. One duck is fine. (Actual duck capacity: several.)

Nume doesn't want anything to do with ducks, metaphorical or otherwise, thank you very much. Pets are annoying.

~Neshomeh has no comment on her own duck capacity. ^_~

Was apparently November 3, 2002, per Odd Lots.

So, the original Board would have turned 17 last November, if it had existed just three more days. It was so close. {= (

And I have NO IDEA where March 12 came from, and since that bit of 2008 vanished without trace, I don't know how to even begin trying to find out. o.o

~Neshomeh

I have no idea what to do with this information. Maybe... shrugs shoulders to muffle quacking coming from comically long trench coat use this to take over the world?

It's going to take me a while to properly look through all of this, but very, very nice! {= D

A few notes for now:

• Sadly, I don't think the dates for Architeuthis on the Hidden Archives are helpful; they don't agree with the release dates on Odd Lots. But, According to P@L, Intel was the first spinoff, and also the first to follow TOS into exile. It seems the first three episodes were rehosted as of May 25, 2002, and the fourth was added on June 17, and the fifth and final was added on December 16. So that's something!

• TOS15 is "The Maiden," and I had it dated May 10, 2002, per the datestamp for the spin-off on Odd Lots and Acacia thanking P@L for hosting them pro tem in her author's note, which I read to mean until they get the mirror site Jay mentions up. Odd Lots is not the mirror site; they were going to have their own.

  • That's clearly wrong, though, since only the first 14 episodes of TOS were on Odd Lots as of Wayback capture date May 16, 2002. {= O

• TOS21 "The Dark Elf" is the one with a link to the Board in the author's notes... and was apparently published on December 27, 2002. Huh.

But, but, hS... If the Board wasn't founded on March 12, 2003, then the Fifth Anniversary Celebration and surrounding shenanigans were, uh, completely wrong.

Um.

BRB, my headcanon and entire worldview just broke. {X D

~Neshomeh

I'm of the opinion that appreciating Sir Terry Pratchett's Discworld series is nigh-essential to properly appreciating PPC humor, and Guards! Guards! is a great place to start. It's the first one I ever read. ^_^ So, don't worry if you've never read any of the other books. If this interests you, jump right in!

~Neshomeh

Well to be honest I never celebrated Easter. I guess that not too many Singaporeans have Easter egg hunts, or it’s just my family and I.

Now excuse me, I’m going too hide a question mark shaped chocolate Easter egg in one of my posts.

~SomeRandomPersonAccount

Link if you're curious.

"Reverse" is weakly written at points, I'll admit, but it's by far the best Dramione AU I've ever read. The premise is that Hermione, during the Battle of Hogwarts, gets hit by a spell and wakes up in an alternate universe where the good guys are the bad guys, the bad guys are the good guys, and Muggle-lovers are subjecting the more traditional wizarding world. It's pretty decent (though I'll admit there are a few moments that make me roll my eyes) but it's far and away the best example of this genre of Potterfic I've seen. Highly recommend and it's made me genuinely tear up a few times. TW for abuse, violence, and gore.

JunoMagic/satismagic's Lothiriel manages to do "Girl falls into Middle-earth and becomes the Tenth Walker" in a canon respectful manner.

It does use the "Westron is English" convention, but other than that, I can't recall any canon issues and in light of how good the story is, I can ignore it. It even manages to place her as the Tenth Walker in a logical manner - Gandalf suggests sending nine and one walkers, to quote directly from the story, "A counterpart to the nine riders foul and black, and one on top, a sign of hidden strength we may yet possess."

There are also some formatting issues in earlier chapters, but they aren't so bad as to make it unreadable.

For reasons I wouldn't know how to explain even if it wasn't so much funnier without context, the Discord has started a tier list of which agents, and possibly Boarders, can carry the most ducks. Here's the doc. Go nuts.

Sorry about the previous version. I lied. Monday doesn't work.

Yeah, I'd love to do it again. It was really fun. Thanks for doing this.

I really don't know what to say here, but I'm glad you liked it, and thanks!

I have to say, I really like the dynamic you have going with these two. They both seem like they'll get along, though there's definitely potential for conflict as well. The prompts made me smile—and the line about how long the cheese has been in the bag made me laugh out loud.

SPaG looked fine. There were no issues that jumped out at me, and your writing flowed naturally enough I didn't have to reread sentences to try and parse them.

You seem to have a solid grasp on the shared universe as well, and the tone of your writing just felt like you've been doing this for a while.

And as for that badfic? Hoo boy. I think my agents would have to buy yours a round of drinks after that mission.

So with all that said—Permission Granted. I can't wait to see Charlie and Jiwon in action together. :)

Lovely, lovely schedules...

Though, first, thank you for the kind words :) I had a good time hosting this, and would love to keep going. Maybe we'll even manage to vanquish the sound issues somehow!

So: keeping the same 10 AM EST timing, since that worked pretty well for everyone, it looks like this week I can do...Monday and probably Thursday. Monday (April 13th) is tomorrow, which might be too short notice for everyone else (though feel free to prove me wrong); how's Thursday (April 16th)?

~Z