Subject: I didn't have my toes stepped on, if that's what you're worried about!
Posted on: 2023-02-21 08:40:44 UTC

Different people react to bigotry in different ways. If Zenzile has always been viewed as a dangerous beast, going "heck it, I'll give them a dangerous beast" and "I better be the Most Polite Gryphon Ever so they don't think I am one of the Bad Ones" are both responses that she could have. What's important is knowing where she is starting in her arc and where you want to take her, like Nesh pointed out.

I'll make sure to keep references to the politics of the 'verse to a minimum. The PPC is, after all, meant to be parody, not satire.

No, no, you don't have to keep it minimised unless you want to! Where your character comes from informs a lot of how they react to things in HQ, and it would do Frederick a huge disservice if he's not allowed to bring his home culture with him. If you're worried about treading on real world political toes, I would suggest you change the names of the futuristic countries instead. Space England versus Space France has a different vibe from Crumpington versus Baguerette. And there's a thin line between parody and satire anyway; one could argue a mission does a little bit of both.

I intentionally chose obscure continua for my agents so I could play others' lack of knowledge about them for laughs.

A couple months ago, Nesh wrote a pretty good thinkpiece about comedy, and, to quote her: "a joke must be based on something both the comedian and the audience agree is true". There's nothing wrong with choosing to bring in characters from obscure continua! But you'll find yourself having to explain the joke more often than not. The rest of us might have the basics of Gryphons (from other fantasy settings) and genetic engineering creating new races that are then oppressed (from... idk, the X-Men, the Incredibles, or other sci-fi). You as the comedian can subvert our expectations based on that knowledge! But that being said, there's a difference between, say, "Gryphons view Sam Eagle as an offensive caricature. Cue Zenzile tearing down Sam Eagle posters in the Small Auditorium", and "Oh, you didn't know Gryphons from The Gryphon Generation have laser eyes? What fools you are!" (Idk if they do. I'm spitballing.)

I'm thinking about whether to expand the original prompt or write a second one, where the two agents have smoothed over the roughest parts in their dynamic and are more at ease with one another. I'm leaning towards the latter. When I'm done, I'll update the document.

I would personally prefer that you expand the original prompt. I would rather see the rougher part of their dynamic because that's where the interesting stuff is. I want to see Zenzile and Frederick's initial prickliness as well as their smoother dynamic later on, but the prickliness is more important to me because it gives the smoother dynamic more payoff.

There's nothing wrong with diving headfirst into a conflict and showing us the gory parts of these two learning to get along. Suvians are notorious for setting up conflict and then skirting by it with speshul powers--just look at Breaking Dawn's anticlimactic final battle. As long as you don't get too lost in the drama or too grimdark, a little more of these two getting to know each other via antagonistic bicker-fest would really hit the spot. Especially if it bleeds into their first mission and causes them to realise they have to put their differences aside to work together!

Again, I think you've got solid writing chops! I think you might be playing it a little safe based off of your answers, so I recommend you have fun and go nuts and give the two the messy first meeting they're clearly set up to have. It will make the smoother dynamic later on feel much more rewarding.

Reply Return to messages