Subject: May I intercede?
Author:
Posted on: 2012-07-30 04:06:00 UTC
(Please note: this was written immediately before I saw your post, but I don't think you have invalidated anything I said. Urrr, actually I may need an endnote...)
This is how I see the above few posts:
Neshomeh has stated that she never supported or condoned Jacer's views, and has apologised for anything she said which might have given the impression that she did ("I am sorry my posts weren't clear enough"). She has also said she is sorry for her part in exploding the thread and causing people to leave.
She has not apologised for (and, in fact, her entire post is an explanation of) her rebuking of people, including Tray, who were acting contrary to how she believed a PPCer should act. I don't get the impression this comes down to blind adherence to the Rules, but rather to (as she terms it) the Golden Rule: politeness and civility. To put it another way, I feel that even without a Constitution she would have made that decision.
I also feel that the way Neshomeh was replied to while asking if she was allowed to defend herself gave the distinct impression that she would, indeed, be seen as defending Jacer by speaking up for herself. I know I felt that way, and the comments in question weren't even aimed at me. I am not saying or implying that anyone actually meant she couldn't defend herself without being condemned - I am just pointing out that, given the state of our emotions at that time, the reading is not implausible.
July has indicated that her objection was less about whether Tray-and-others should be rebuked at all, and more about whether they should be rebuked in that particular thread. She states that 'The issue at hand was Jacer's behavior', indicating that other people's behaviour in response to the discussion of Jacer's behaviour should not have been commented on at that time, and also indicates (correct me, please, if I'm wrong) that publically rebuking someone who is in a fragile emotional state is Not A Good Idea. She does not deny that the behaviour of certain people required a response at some point - just that the response needed to be in that setting.
(A Huinesoron aside: I don't believe in general terms that people should go unrebuked in a public setting where they have broken the Golden Rule. If Jacer had been called out instead for egregious swearing, I think that someone who set to insulting Jacer would have been quite appropriately rebuked. However, in specific cases of emotional vulnerability... see next paragraph. July, this aside is mostly for you, since it's the one point where I'm unclear on your views: in a less volatile situation, such as the swearing one, would Neshomeh's actions have been appropriate in your view?)
The Key Section
With all these words flying around, it seems to me that these two respected Boarders - yes, I'm talking to you two, and even I respect you both - actually disagree on very little. Essentially it comes down to: should a person who has noted that they are in a fragile emotional state be publically and immediately rebuked for using emotional language, in a setting where this may cause them to break?
I think that July would say that they should not be. I would like to know what Neshomeh thinks - what she thinks is the answer to my question, and what, in hindsight (which is 20/20) she feels she could have done to stop 'this thread [turning] into a flamefest' that wasn't what she did.
Neshomeh - I want you to know that the PPC Board is still a safe place. I don't think anyone will start attacking you if you post what you think about this specific question. I am positive that no one will see an admission of making a mistake - if you feel you made any mistakes, I am not making that judgement call - as a sign of weakness.
I can say this, because I have now apologised three times, and have not been mocked for it in any of them. I made a major mistake in assuming all the information had been made available to me, and a second (judging from the response, far larger) by posting without due thought for how it would be perceived in response to I think your post. I apologise (yet again) for both of those mistakes. I don't think anyone sees this as a confession that I was supporting Jacer's actions - just that I am human Eldarin, and mistakes happen.
hS
(PS: This was supposed to be a short post...)
(PPS: Neshomeh: please don't leave)