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I really shouldn't have eaten before reading that.

…I am bumping "Harry Potter and the Weapon of Atlantis" to #29. This will be #27 instead.

Trisha is the one slashing you. she has this idea that if she slashs you, to be nice ot her and such, she can change reality and her Saryona to love her. Crazy idea, what what can you expect from a fanbrat?

... "Little Miss Mary", too. But their examples were pretty hilarious, if not quite as brain-breaking.

...and Teek will probably come back to find Crelmos bashing his head against the wall, as he has been doing for the past five consecutive minutes.

A line Crelmos is likely to remember would probably be.... "So, is all of you like that? Wanna show me?" *cue horrifying whammy of inexplicable attraction* :p

...so I probably WILL. Nyeh. xP

Hmmm... sounds like Kirk. *is shot by William Shatner fangirls*

Anyway, Cavan's not gay. His preferences are as follows; 'is it legal enough to not inconvenience me?', 'is it aware enough to be some kind of challenge to seduce?' and 'is he/she/it attractive to me?'
I once heard the term 'omnisexual', and it pretty much fits. XD

...er, wow. :D

And yes, it would. I would assume that Cardassians probably aren't very open about certain preferences in any case (probably because the other options don't result in offspring, and where would the Galaxy's finest race be then?), but seeing what Crelmos's original personality was like, it's going to be even worse. xD

Because yeah, there are homosexual Token Lecherous Jerks in fanfiction, but he sure isn't one of them. Being scientific, he might even view that as some sort of genetic dysfunction.

Please stop tempting me to write this, kthx. :D

...I saw the first few words of #5 and had to leave.

I am filthy-minded. I have a little taste for such things where humor is concerned, as long as it's witty and well-written.

But?

DO. NOT. WAAAAAAAAANT.

*hugs poor Picard*

*grabs as much Bleepolate and Bleepulan Ale as is possible*

For having strong pheromones, and also for a form of empathy...so they can whammy you chemically, emotionally, and in a Force-sensitive's case, with Force influence as well.
It makes them very...ehm, persuasive. :p

And I'm guessing even hitting on him in passing would sicken Crelmos.

*gives you the Vulcan salute*

I'm glad you liked it; this was probably my favorite mission so far. Plus, it's unbelievably fun to drive Teek completely berserk.

Well, I certainly don't wish to give your Agents trauma...

...but since I've just read your mission (quite amusing, by the way, despite the utter stupidity of the fic), I'm also rather tempted to have Cavan encounter Crelmos in the hallways.

Because Teek really deserves to ask him why he's looking so nauseated, and then start laughing hysterically. The poor girl needs some revenge. ^-^

If it won't work, it won't work.

I just found an interesting article on Cracked.com, which details the 5 Most Baffling Sex Scenes in Fanfiction History. It doesn't really go into anything graphic, otherwise my mind would have exploded, but it's an interesting read. Number 2 was quite warped for me...

http://www.cracked.com/article165545-most-baffling-sex-scenes-in-history-fanfiction.html

So yeah, mind-warping is to ensue. Bleeprin and Bleepolate is on me!

1/3 of way done. 541 words so far. about 959 words to go. and yes, I am remembering to use the sensei's when refering to the manga characters. Don;t want to be defenstered.

will need some time to berush up on TRC history, but I do like XXholic, so know about there.

"The mate was fixed by the bosun's pike,
The bosun brained wid a marlinspike,
An' cooky's throat was marked belike
It 'ad been gripped by fingers ten,
An' there they lay, all good dead men
Like break o' day in a boozin' ken,
Yohoho an' a bottle o' rum!"

(I am such a geek I memorised the whole thing: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DeadMan%27sChest)

Yer a fine dancer, lass! Bu' y'can' dance a goo' hornpipe wi' but one dancer, so let's ge' oursel's some oth'r scurvy sons o' seadogs t'join us, aye?

*joins Cassie in the hornpipe*

Sabbat: *rolls his eyes at the 'pirate' talk and grabs himself another tankard of rum*

Well, I can't quite say. It looks like it's just someone borrowing the names of canon characters so they have a place to post their story.

I've added it to the "Unclaimed Badfic" list on the ppc wiki.

It be "Drink an' the devil 'ad done for th' rest".

But ye be a fine shanty singer, aye. *narrows eyes* But 'ow well can ye dance an 'ornpipe? *looks over to the pirate musicians* Play on, lads'n'lasses! *launches into a hornpipe dance*

*shoves Miss Angel aside* Next Friday. That should be fine.