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And it's fine. The mission is years old and was found in the trash of the writer's Google Docs, so I doubt it's going to get fixed anyways, and it probably doesn't matter since the badfic in question was deleted, too. Just wanted to get it off my chest.

...Also, the mission didn't seem to have been proofread, either. There were a few spelling mistakes here and there, and I believe I also saw at least one dropped apostrophe. (And I'm pretty certain that a decent proofreader would've caught the .44/.45 Auto mistake, too.)

A pleasure to have you back among us. /passes along some chocolate bark/

Wouldn't know anything about those charges, though, sadly. :/

So, I recently dove back into the PPC (by the way, Hello again! My previous incarnation was Anonymouse, and before that, ThePoketrix, but it's been YEARS since I've been on here, so long that I can't even find my old posts in the Search anymore... and I also go by yet another different name here on the Internet nowadays, hence the second name change), and was reading a mission involving the Fallout continuum, (specifically, Journey Down a Long Road, by ShatteredSanity, covering the eponymous badfic by C.Stewart which... doesn't exactly exist anymore... when I noticed that the agents in the fic were incorrect in the charges they gave.

Specifically, the badfic mentions that the Sue had, quote, "a silver .45 automatic pistol with a snakeskin handle." The agents seem to have erroneously mixed up the .45 Auto pistol (a weapon based on the Colt 1911, added by the DLC Honest Hearts) with the .44 Magnum revolver, judging from the line, "Secondly, where did the Stu get a .44 , which are rare enough on their own, with a snakeskin handle?", which seem to have masked the actual charge here.

There is a .45 Auto pistol with a snakeskin handle in the game. It is the unique weapon A Light Shining in Darkness, owned by Joshua Graham (and, should the Courier complete Honest Hearts, owned by the Courier). However, A Light Shining in Darkness is not made of silver- it is made out of the same sort of metal that normal .45 Auto pistols are made of, which is presumably normal steel. (The actual special thing about A Light Shining in Darkness's appearance, besides the snakeskin grip, along with minute details like the skeletonized hammer and trigger, shorter barrel, trench sights, et cetera, is that it has a quote from the Bible- "And the light shineth in darkness, and the darkness comprehended it not,"- engraved in Greek on its sides.)

The charge shouldn't be simply "Having a gun with a snakeskin handle," since that isn't a charge in the Fallout universe, because A Light Shining in Darkness exists. The charges should be "Having in your possession A Light Shining in Darkness, which is a unique weapon owned by Joshua Graham and/or the Courier. Transmuting the metal that A Light Shining in Darkness is made of from steel to silver."

In addition, another of the charges against him is "Having a bullet-proof vest." While one of the traders at the 188 Trading Post does mention that the NCR used to give bulletproof vests to its soldiers, what makes me raise an eyebrow is that there is an instance of an actual, SWAT-style bulletproof vest existing in the game, that can be acquired by the courier. It exists as part of... wait for it... Joshua Graham's armor, obtained alongside A Light Shining in Darkness. So again, the charge should be "Having in your possession a unique piece of armor. Tearing apart said unique piece of armor to wear only part of it," instead of merely "Having a bullet-proof vest."

By the way, if it wasn't obvious by my paragraphs-long rant about how a badfic that was killed years ago actually deserved a few charges that are worse than what it actually got, I'm a bit of a Fallout fan (enough to get very, very irked about how much people praise that one mod that adds holorifles to Fallout 4 for being lore-friendly. In the name of Arceus's well-lit tailpipe, no, it is not lore-friendly, the Holorifle is a unique weapon and all copies of it should either be in the Sierra Madre or in the possession of the Courier!). I'm also really into Pokemon, MLP, Terraria, Harry Potter, and quite a few other things. Also, I'm a bit of an RPer, so... yeah. Hello again.

You realise I still have an unfinished cowrite with Lily Winterwood, right? Come to think of it, the only reason Brown DragonRider is 'finished' is that I stuck a rough endcap on it and posted it. Cowrites are emphatically not my thing.

I'll try and have a poke at it. ;)

hS

There were a few things I did change because the old way hurt my brain and I thought being true to the intent and the content was more important than being true to crappy old HTML, but you are the voice in the back of my head I have to argue with anytime I make a decision like that. ^_~

So, I give you transparency in addition to making things better, and hopefully everyone is happy.

~Neshomeh

(Speaking of workrate, any chance of getting back to our cowrite anytime soon...?)

I'll have to sit down and get all those prompts I did with the Nursery kids sorted into some semblance of order next.

I figured Miss MacKinnon deserved some character beyond, "please adopt this child immediately." And now she gets her own pet. Yay!

Hey, now. This was a pair of stories that had origins in 2011. So it only took me three-and-a-half years each. It's much more reasonable to expect a follow-up around the switch from 2021 to 2022.

—doctorlit, far more productive than you make him out to be

I was worried about balancing an argument that felt real enough to matter with, you know, actually keeping the story fun and humorous. So I'm glad it worked for you!

Oh, I would absolutely have the same reaction as Doc—he's based on me, after all. So I'm not one to talk about priorities . . .

—doctorlit, pleased

I especially approve of the links to the original pages - I should probably do that to, though at my workrate hahaha.

hS

Thank you all for the gifts and advice! I apologize for the SPaG in mi earlier posts.

It was cute getting to see Mollie and Ollie get settled into the Nursery. And Miss MacKinnon recounting her first reaction to seeing all those books was great. :)

I assume we can see a follow-up in 2025?

This was really cute and made me smile! I'm a sucker for stories where people fight and then both realize they overreacted or didn't quite get it, and this is a good one. (Though personally I would have reacted pretty much the same way as Doc about the books -- maybe I should reexamine my priorities.)

But yeah, I really liked it! A fantastic interlude!

Also: Jaaaacques. ;; An ethical flirter! And wishing her good will even when she's being more than a bit of a nuisance...

Best of luck/focus with schoolwork!

Have one of my own shed feathers and a complimentary kit of Spikes!

I'll have to give it another read without the beta hat on. Cheers!

~Neshomeh

Since Ix hasn't been around to do it yet, may I point you toward our Constitution? That and the Original Series are pretty much the only required reading around here, and it looks like you've already read TOS. {= ) The wiki also has several pages designed to help newbies figure out what's what.

Please use your best SPaG while you're here. Posts on the Board can't be edited, and we are a group dedicated to good writing, after all. Thanks!

~Neshomeh

And I'm glad you enjoyed them both! They were both kind of tricky to write, truth be told, so I'm very happy to hear they entertained.

—doctorlit, thinking of doing a simpler mission for the next installment

She tends to, after all--the Quik Quotes Quill certainly made some interesting things out of Harry's answers in the fourth book. She's just taking a...slightly different tack with Jacques, even if she does do a fair bit with his angst as well. She's also added things, and twisted them--for one thing, the only dead Ianto Jones Jacques has ever come in contact with was a replacement. He was recruited long before Ianto's death in canon and thus has no memory of it.

In fact, a regular version of the final two excerpts might run like so:

Well, that hadn't worked. She was still impressively undistracted from all the questions he didn't want to answer. He had to admire her tenacity, even if he wished she had less of it.

Time to step up the game.

"Enough about me, Rita." He pulled her closer, trailing his fingers over her arm. "Tell me about you. Someone with your reporting history must have some great stories to tell!"

She giggled and looked down--good. Maybe this would actually work. It was certainly the only thing he'd found so far that did distract her--he'd noticed the discreet admiring looks almost immediately. They would have been far more welcome if they hadn't come as the side dish to a whole bunch of painful questions.

"Oh, I do," she said. "But yours--yours are so very interesting. Tell me more about your early days in ESAS. Or maybe about the first person you ever seduced in HQ?"

Jacques chuckled, the sound only a little forced, and pulled her even closer. If this didn't move the interview in a far more interesting direction, he had no idea what would. "Why don't I tell you about how I plan to seduce you?"

Gratifyingly, her eyes widened--and, for the first time since he'd met her, she was speechless.

...

They'd very much moved on to flirting now, much to Jacques' relief. He had to give her credit, though--she was still asking questions, even if most of them seemed to be part of her flirting style. It was suddenly a little bit charming, that her work had permeated even this aspect of her life so well.

"You seduce so many people," she was purring now. Her hand was on his arm, but despite the calculating undertone to her voice, her eyes were fixed on his. "Is it always a split second decision, or are there people you wait on seducing?"

He pulled back a little, laughing quietly. "You know, I don't seduce everyone I meet. Some of them aren't interested, for one thing, and, well...I do have people I've known for five years, practically the whole time I've been here, who I've never really gone for. You know how it is."

"Of course," she said. "Five years, though? What's kept you from trying?"

Jacques shrugged. "Apart from people I just don't have a chance with, or who turned me down the second I offered? I..." He paused, thinking about it. If this made it into her article, he thought he could take it--it could even serve as a reminder to him, at certain moments. "It wouldn't have worked, I guess. The time wasn't right, for both of us. It would've been a disaster, and then we settled into friendship, and..." He shrugged. "I suppose it might happen someday, but I'm not holding my breath."

Had she even heard all of that? Her eyes had dropped to his mouth halfway through. He'd be impressed if she'd caught most of it.

He leaned forward, returning the favor and adopting his flirtiest tone. "Did you catch any of that?"

"What?" She looked up, and actually blushed. He hadn't expected that.

He reached out a hand, brushing his fingers over the red in her cheeks. "Never mind."

"When did you decide to seduce me?" she blurted. Uncomposed words from a very composed woman--he loved it. That and the way she was still asking questions.

"About five minutes after you started talking to me," he said, grinning. No need to add that the decision had been based partially on distracting her, since brushing her off hadn't worked. It wasn't like he objected to the impending outcome, anyway. He leaned in, skimming his hands up her arms to cup her face, and lowered his voice. "Tell me, lovely Rita...have I managed it yet?"

She kissed him. He wanted to laugh triumphantly; instead, he wrapped his arms around her and set about kissing her breathless.

(He was, in fact, careful not to disturb her hair. He wasn't sure if he could, or how she could possibly get it looking presentable again to begin with.

After all, he still wanted her good will, even if that was quickly taking second place to everything else.)

--

So--kernels of truth, some polishing of lines, some changing of them altogether, and quite a bit of attraction. And, y'know, romance novel narration.

As to being Ana Steele...not enough inner goddesses and subconsciouses :P And I regret to inform you that she went into publishing, though actually the series does open with her filling in for her journalist best friend on an interview, because obviously it can't be rescheduled or given to an actual other student journalist rather than this random...English major, possibly.

(Though, also, Ana's not nearly interesting enough to be Rita Skeeter. Rita may be awful, but at least she isn't bland.)

--

Anyway. Glad you liked it! :) I'm not sure if there'll be any more, since I have a fair bit of schoolwork to get done (did this on a food break), but we'll see. If I get time and inclination before this thread falls off the page, I might go for it.

~Z

So, yeah, Lorson's feelings come across rather well in this and it totally makes sense why he'd be spacing out - and lying about it.

- Tomash

Though, you DO have to fill in the 'author' prompt on every comment you make. |D Otherwise it can get confusing.

and I liked the ending with the nickname. The change of tone gave a good ending without being whiplash-y.

(Also, Shadowrun, yeah?)