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Good for getting people to believe you are who you say you are. Welcome!

A lone agent walked into the echoing auditorium. "Hello? There was a birthday here?" She was a day late. She scrounged in the corners for bits of cake, then set down the bag of holding she was carrying. "I'll just leave this for next year..." She wandered out again.

slash, rape and incest fics are a part of most fandoms. Sometimes they are well written, a lot of the time they aren't.

I write slash, I'm not ashamed to admit that, and I don't see anything wrong with it. As long as the characters are IC, then it isn't a problem. Very few people in life are completely, 100% straight or gay. Experimentation, especially amongst teens, happens. As long as these facts are acknowledged, there is nothing wrong with writing a slash fic.

If you have to break up a canonical pairing, heterosexual or otherwise, for your slash, with little reason other than 'all women are evil/his wife was abusing him/he didn't love her really', then that's not right. There should be a reason for ignoring canon pairings. You can make it a past fic if you have to. Just provide justification for the breaking up of canonical happiness.

If you, as the author, don't want fans to slash two characters then you should strive to put in as little subtext between them as possible. The pairings I write are ones that have canonical subtext in them, and in some cases are actually the most popular pairings in the fandom.

Rape!fic is trickier. It's not something I'd write, mostly because I don't think I could do it justice, but there are some characters in my fandoms that I think would carry out that act. That's not to say that all characters would rape someone, or that all people think that way, but rather that it's my personal interpretation. Unfortunately rape, non-con and dub-con fics are very rarely written well and so are an off-putting factor for many people.

Incest is not something I read or write, except on rare occasions, i.e. the relationship between the characters wasn't revealed until late in the canon and there weren't even hints of it before that. However, some people find incest interesting and some people just like to write about two 'hawt' characters having sex. Those are the people who are unlikely to be stopped by banning fanfiction of a series. Even authorial statements of 'that would never happen' are often ignored by fanfiction writers.

As for stopping kink fics, that's very difficult. You can't state 'I will allow fanfiction but only as long as everyone writes about canon relationships and doesn't deviate from what I have written at all and I don't want people writing anything kinky'. You either allow it, the good and the bad, kink fic and gen fic, or you ban it altogether.

And he's a good writer of tearjerk moments.

Note how many of these moments were written by hS...

http://wikimaster.livejournal.com/1222.html?view=1734#t1734

Exactly as it says on the tin. Enjoy!

PS: This is not a forshadowing of some new PPC emergency. At least not yet.

Another PS: I did ask if I could tack new enemies on the PPC.

Here! Have these Fang syringes I just made. Easy to carry, light, and looks just like a Fountain pen save for the needle sticking out. With a little you can inject poison into your enemies with a single stab from The tip.

I made them myself.

"Wouldn't surprise me either," he said. "Pretty poor melody that's got. The songs you sing around the blowing the candles out bit are a lot nicer."

"I was convinced it was 'sausages on the bus' when I was little," Deryn remarked. She popped a jelly baby into her mouth and said, "Sounds good. I mean, I don't dance well- aside from the box move, I've forgotten anything school taught me about dancing- but I like it."

"Just don't do it with your mouth full," Leas muttered, and followed Deryn out to the dance area- after she'd poked her tongue out at him, of course.

After all, Foreshadowing is important.

Any badfic writers living there are in SO much trouble...

The library where I work had me shelving business directories recently, and one of the names stuck out to me.

Canon City, Colorado.

I have no idea what we'd use it for, but I think that would be the perfect place for some kind of PPC presence, whether in-fic or as a Gathering site. Has any of us been there, and so been able to describe the place?

""RUN!" Dafydd Illian yelled, with all the power of an Elf who has lived in the Blessed Realm under the light of the Two Trees of Valinor. Constance threw herself backwards away from him and dove behind a rock. Lifting her head for less than half a second, she had a brief glimpse of Dafydd standing at the heart of an inferno as the full power of Sairalindë's ring was unleashed, and then the world

turned

white."

"A low, almost subsonic, buzzing could be heard. “Oh no!” cried Makes-Things. “Get a phaser, Agent Cameron!” Then he screamed. Tawaki heard a sickening crunch and a thump, and the connection ended.
“Makes-Things? Makes-Things? MAKES-THINGS? S---.” "

There's also Nyx choosing to leave with Dassie, the Building of the Tomb of the Unknown PPC Agent, and Jay and Acacia's retirement.

I think the others are right, y'know. This year we've had the Macrovirus Invasion in March, the Mary-Sues Invasion in April running on from that, the Robecca exorcism in Narnia in July, and the spambot/Ypur Invasion a few days ago which resulted in us switching Boards.

We really don't need any more emergencies, major threats or full-out wars. The Catastrophe Theory adherents are already going to be going berserk and waving placards about Doom and the End being Near. If you want to see the other emergencies we've had, the Wiki page "PPC Emergencies" will tell you everything.

Not to mention that HQ, while back to normal business, suffered a drastic loss of agents during the first two Invasions this year and therefore probably would struggle to cope with another war.

And as a final point against carryng this idea out right now (I'm not saying "Forget it, we'll never do this", just "Hold back and wait"), a few months ago we were requested by hS to remember that the purpose of the PPC is entertainment, not continually taking down the big guns. I believe his metaphor was along the lines of "It's very satisfying taking down a Death Star, but while you're doing that there's a thousand TIE fighters on your tail".

I'd suggest taking on a few regular missions- exorcising slashwraiths from Legolas and Aragorn or killing off another twin sister of Harry Potter or something- before we have to deal with yet another problem that pulls us all off regular duty.

On the other hand, I do think this sounds like an idea with a lot of potential and I would be happy to join in with it. I am also curious as to where the Flowers would go, as their original world no longer exists.

"I've always wondered who invented that song. Probably the Legal Department or something, I wouldn't be surprised." She looked over at the annoyed-looking group around the stereo, which began to break up as Tyler zoomed out of the door.

"Figured he wouldn't stay long," she grinned. "Well the music's been sorted now, so anybody want a dance?" She started moving toward the poeple who were more than a little tipsy already and more or less wobbling in time to the strains of "I Want To Break Free".

*hands over a box of biscuits* Handy even once the biscuits have been eaten! *grins*

Good to meet you! Hope you enjoy it here.

Do not worry about it. I am sure that it was an honest mistake... *notices several people approaching with rather angry expressions* Ah... I think I had best depart. My work here at HQ has made me a goodly number of enemies.

*heads out the door rather quickly*

"Er. English, I meant," Leas said, looking haunted.

Deryn shoved an iced biscuit at him before he said anything else he'd regret.

"It's not that she's really bad," he admitted. "But she's off-key- Deryn, stop that!- and it's bad enough in German."

"Hey, there're worse songs I could pull out," Deryn pointed out, handing Leas a plate. "Not while the music's on, though, and not while it's your birthday. It'd be a shame to ruin that."

(Okay. I just wonder about the arrangements for the page names, since this Tyler doesn't seem to have a last name. He's pretty distinctive, though- got turned into a Pak- Nixen's Known Space verse, apparently; I'm not personally familiar with it- and Medical couldn't reverse it, so I doubt anyone'd mistake them on sight.)