The PPC Posting Board - Latest posts

We got into a good MSN chat, and somehow came up with the idea of writing a story based on fantasy cliches, where most of the names are reversals of ordinary words and names. The working title is "Fantasy By Numbers (And Some Backwards Names)". The cast so far is as follows, listed in order of creation:

Samoht, the Generic Desert Rider extra

Ardnassac, the bard who shows up to deliver an ancient song with convenient clues

Eissac, the guard escorting Our Heroes through the woodland fortress

Ennaxor, the Big Bad's underling who kicks Our Hero's ass in about Chapter Three, then gets killed ignominiously around Chapter Ten

Xela, the demoness whose wiles leave her beheaded

Yxor, the Big Bad who has taken control of the king

Newlir, the Standard Elf Guy who is Teh Awsum with a bow

Tarp, the local yokel and standard Hairy-Footed Short Thing

Gnik, the good king

Elcycib, the friendly big-bosomed tavern wench

Oreh the Mighty, the Hero

Dren the Weedy, the main sidekick

Krod, the ogre with bad timing and worse footwork

Resol, the very bad assassin

Ome the Androgynous (and angsty)

They live in the land of Onnudi.

We also have a few quotes from the as yet unwritten story.

"What shall we call ourselves?" "Why not Dnabeht?" "Dnabeht, Ardnassac? Why a silly name like that?" "It seemed to fit the theme." "What theme?" "You know what? Forget it. Would 'Oreh's Group' work?" "BRILLIANT!" "...*sigh*"

"Here. My song. I was told to learn this while I was becoming a bard. It has never been appropriate until now, I've never until now been able to sing it, and you're going to analyse the words and ignore my talent entirely, so let's get it over with?"

"Oh, I am so depressed. My mum died after living a long and happy life, warm in her bed, with those she loved around her..." "Oh, Ome, shut up. You got the house." "But the house...it is a fount of tragedy and despair..." "If you don't want it, I'll take it..." "*hastily* No, Resol, that house is *my* despair-filled burden, I cannot lay it upon you."

"Krod's pants itch." "Why?" "Krod wiped Krod's rear with funny-looking leaves. Krod can feel swellings." All:*shudder* "*sarcastically* Krod should make sure not to do that next time then." "There will be next time?" "Yes, seeing as you never pay attention when we point out poison ivy."

And also rather smug. I'd correct people on how OOC the characters were under sockpuppet names, then drop an "I am the author, THAT's how I know they're OOC" bomb.

...Besides, I'd throw in subtext liek whoa just to see what the results were. :p

And I had been looking at the TVTropes wiki's horrible fanfic page and Morbid Curiosity got me. *shoots Morbid Curiosity*

prussic acid makes things go boom when it contacts them...

My favourite acid would have to be nitric - explosives are so much easier with it around...

...as a whole. Sorry! Do you know any flowers or gemstones, that symbolize guilt and apology? I need to send Anti-Lustin versions to you right away. Of course, you might not want those, considering how I acterd...

Immature mode: Temporarily off.

...those two fandoms. At least the Retcons and the Revalations actually work.

Immature mode: Still on.

Gospel truth smashed... Beloved(but not good) plotbunnies killed... Defenses against fanbrats who can't comprehened the finer points of the Pokemon/Digimon debate iredeemably damaged... EVACUATE THE FANDOMS! EVACUATE! EVACUATE! EVACUATE! FLEE TO WARCRAFT! FLEE TO WARCRAFT!

Immature mode coming!

It's not like we're going to run out of mini-Balrogs to adopt.

*hears a knock at the door*

Ah, hello Ewoyn. Now, let's get you fed and on your way home...

*aside to Lily* I think I'll handle it from here, in case she gets it into her head to sneak back after you. Thanks for looking after her.

Didn't we kind of put a moratorium on this kind of thing a while back? "Squick for squick's sake," that is. Looking at that URL, it's not like you were innocently browsing ff.net and came across some random Trek PWP.

~Neshomeh

For example, we could be the PPC - a collection of people who strive to make use of a satirical sense of humour to define what is 'Acceptable' and what isn't in the world of Fanfiction writing. To do this, we make stories that parody the cliches of writing, using a pre-existing text as our basis.

Or, otherwise, the PPC is an organisation of sentient beings who are controlled to take a stand against the stock character of the 'Mary Sue'

That's my definition anyways.

Although as a luker I don't think my opinion really counts.

OH GOD MY VIRGIN EYES! *claws at face*

It has to have a cat disguise. How would it take this?

Looking at the page delineating what the PPC is on the Wiki, I've been thinking that it could do with expanding on.. It's looking a bit bare :)

So, what IS the PPC? What do we need to say to explain our eclectic, esoteric and eldritch activities? Ideas?

...and in my trust-me-I'm-not-a-doctor-type 'professional opinion', I don't think it'd make a good mission. The technicalities of the writing are passable enough, and the NSFB aspects just go on at a fairly regular (and excessive) level all the way through so it's not like you could go partway and expect to exorcise at the 'most appalling part'. There isn't an appalling part. It's all just ... flatlining appalling.

That said, if anyone *does* want to take it on, consider me at your service for beta-reading etc and Agent Trojie can be ganked if you want backup.

I second the "KILL IT!" I didn't get much farther than you, but... Sweet deities of many fictional universes. I'm not very familiar with Next Generation, but that is simply GAH. Even I can tell that nobody would be able to touch canon with a thirty-five-and-a-half-foot pole.

What's sad is that it's actually got good grammar, capitalization, punctuation, and spelling. Perhaps written as a parody? Although, I think it would be going a little far even for that. *winces* I'm going to go hide under my table now.

Thanks.