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Here's the link to the story. I don't know if it's just me, but I find ageplay (this is a One Piece ageplay fic) to be a very squicky kink. It gets worse when you realize the implications of having your romantic partner act like a baby- it goes straight into borderline-pedophile territory. (Bleepfic warning)

...yeah. I think that post title says most of it.

Basically, what happened is that The Magnus Archives had a massive car crash inside my head with various other horror and paranormal stories I like (most notably, Jujutsu Kaisen and hints of the SCP Foundation), as well as a lot of old story ideas I haven't used in longform projects for various reasons. The resulting story is... not the most original thing in the world, but it's been well-received on the Discord so far, so I figured I'd share it here as well. It's a paranormal story with strong horror elements, and it's pretty Blacklist-heavy, but I'll put warnings before each chapter. The premise can be summed up as "everyman protagonist joins a secret organization keeping peace between the human and supernatural world", and I know there are a million stories with that exact premise. But on one hand, this is basically about extremely tired, overworked weirdos with various unpleasant body horror-y superpowers running around fighting extremely freaky things, and on the other hand, it's less a straightforward narrative and more a branching anthology with various perspectives and different formats (narratives, case files, mission reports, bulletins, you get me). There are two or three protagonists, but I've been more inspired by various shared horror/fantasy universes as well as TMA for the most part, so this is going to be... different. And fun, hopefully.

You can access the story here. [EDIT: I've updated the link here, so it will direct you to the current home of this story on WordPress, rather than the Wattpad one. You can still find it on Wattpad if you really want to in the previous version of this post, but I'd appreciate it if you used the WordPress link instead. It's where the regular updates are happening, so I figured it would be easier for everyone involved to give the link where you can find out all of the currently-available story, rather than a version I only plan on updating sporadically.]

Warnings are as follows: - chapter 1: body horror, BL2 from the PPC blacklist, lots of swearing; - chapter 2: body horror, more BL2, swearing; - chapter 3: body horror, heavy BL2, eyes being hurt, two brief fire-related injury mentions, and general disturbing things involving decay and dissociation.

Chapter 3 is my favorite so far, but I would like to hear any and all feedback. I worked very hard on this. Damian from this very community did the beta work on all three chapters, and he also worked hard on it. So. Y'know. I'd love it if you horror-reading folks checked this out.

Charlie walked over to the pile of presents and took the top one, before sawing off its lid with a few deft claw strokes. Taking a look at its contents, they paused, then reached in, pulling out a clump of dark fur. They blinked a few times, rolling the stuff between their fingers to confirm that yes, it was in fact fur.

They looked over at their partner. “Hey, Jiwon? Is this from you?”

Despite being a fox and thus lacking much of an expressive face, Jiwon still managed to shoot them an incredulous look.

Charlie shrugged. “I’ll take that as a no, then.”

I'd love to read more of your awesome headcanons!

He was a minor member of the House of the Golden Flower, a follower of Glorfindel, and one of the exiles who escaped the city. He witnessed the death of his lord to the Balrog, and finally made it down to the Havens of Sirion. There he met a Sindarin woman of Doriath, also a refugee, and ultimately married her.

Tarthir is thus what people term a 'havenborn' - a child of a marriage between refugees in the last stages of the War of the Jewels. They're not uncommon in Second Age Lindon. (He wasn't actually born in the havens, so in a sense it's a misnomer.)

His father-name, Lissuin, is a memorial of the flower of his House. And the stories his father told him, about the mighty half-Vanyarin Balrog slayer with golden hair, are part of why he took up with the young Vanya when he reached Eressea.

The other bit of character development that springs out of this is that both his parents have similar past trauma. They both lived in 100% safe kingdoms within impassable barriers - and both were breached and destroyed. They carried that with them the rest of their days.

(It also explains why he hangs out at Rivendell: Elrond is the heir of both Gondolin and Doriath, and THE Glorfindel lives there too...!)

Givee me a day or two and I can write this up as a single coherent profile, rather than a scatter of thoughts.

hS

This really is an AU. =]

Seriously though this is all so cool and I've been kinda remiss in telling you that. Thanks for entertaining my ramblings.

I also really like your point about great heroes and greater deeds not mattering in the Grim Darkness of the Far Future. One person cannot win against a galaxy of madness. But one person can touch the Force, shape it, lose themselves in it. The Force can change the tides of vast empires, through its use and mastery by a single person. A speck, on the galactic scale. It reminds me of that one Doctor Who quote: "I've been travelling for nine hundred years, and in all that time, I've never met someone who wasn't important before."

The thing is... now I don't really know what to do next. I have zero Warsy knowledge beyond the films. I know that Bob and Lionel are going to fight (and make Christmas dinner awkward). I know Leia's going to become a Master. I just... don't know what else. And there's other stuff that just bugs me. What about the Farsight Enclaves? What are the Craftworlders up to? Has anyone told the Exodites what the hell is going on? Given that Nids can brute-force the Force, what about Force sensitives within Genestealer Cults? What's happening with the Indomitus Crusade and the Primaris Marines? I can't answer these questions. I mean, I probably could, but I can't answer them all at once, and each time I answer one the nagging from the others gets worse. Hell, I just realised that Sheev might be planning to break into the Black Library with a force of Sith in a dark mirror of the Rebel Alliance's raid on the Rock, and now I want that to happen, but I can't make the right words come out.

So what's next in this conflict? We're sixteen years into the Merged Galaxies setting and there's so much stuff left to explore. Where do we go? Where do we start?

Balance, I need, Master. =]

Having missioned in continua populated by yōkai, she nevertheless still has minor trouble believing she's actually interacting with a cat-person and a creature called a kyūbi or a yōko in her language. Even so, she thanks the duo in English, not heeding the traces of glittery substance staining her palms and her dark green dress.

---

[[Yuki speaking: The dark green dress is from this drawing by Lily Winterwood]]

“Ooh, nice one! That thing’s a real beauty‒ provided you don’t try to fight with it. The balance is too off for it to swing right, but at least it looks pretty.” The tabaxi’s arms rested behind their head, and their chair was leaned back against the wall.

“Just don’t mind the glitter. Belonged to a Narnia-type Suvian, and Jiwon never got to cleaning it off.”

Beside them, their gumiho partner blinked in surprise. "Wait, why was that my job again?"

"You were the one who took it in the first place, right?"

Jiwon hesitated, then sighed. "Well, um. Yeah, I guess so." And with that he shifted into a fox and curled up on the seat of his chair, resting his bushy tail over his snout.

Charlie shrugged, then took a moment to readjust their hat.

When I first came up with the AU idea, I briefly headcanoned AU-Kaguya as a Gondolin native. I never thought of what House he'd belong to, or whether he'd survive the fall.

The gift she's unwrapped half resembles a weapon, half a model of a DNA chain, the blades gleaming chillingly, the hilts richly carved and decorated with jewels. It looks like it could've been a legendary, limited event item in a fantasy MMORPG, available only to players most unflinching in paying out and emptying out their real-life wallets. She doesn't know exactly how to use this object, but there's no denying it's the most beautiful thing she's ever seen.

"It's all yours, Momo," her master says, smiling sweetly. "I'm not one for bladed weapons."

I'll be sure to feature them on the blog post, so all that elaborate goodness doesn't get washed away in the stream of board posts. Thanks a bunch for the beautiful headcanons! (I do feel like a total noob after reading all that Tolkien nerdery) 😆

Since this is the first time participating in this type of thing for most of us, here's a link to the last Gift Exchange RP so you can know how the formatting for these tends to go.

Hopefully this link works.

Thanks!

-OrangeFox

Momoka is fairly easy. There's no Quenya word for 'peach' (or 'pink'), but peach trees are noted for flowering very early, before their leaves even come out. Elves actually recognise six seasons, with the first being (in English) 'stirring' ; so she is Coirelótë, "Early (/Stirring) blossom".

Kaguya is... a decision. We can translate him directly: Lissui is Sindarin for "eternal fragrance". It comes very close to being the name of a flower from Eressea, Lissuin, so he might just be named that.

On the other hand... Middle-earth also has its stories of someone from the moon who keeps getting into trouble. That would be Tilion, the archer who drives the thing; there are at least two Hobbit songs about him getting stuck on the ground and having trouble at the inn.

As far as I can tell, Tilion is one of those names that is identical in both Sindarin and Quenya. But I'm not sure a literal god-name is a good idea! Instead, we could use "Tillon", swapping two male endings out (technically we go from "he of the horns" to "Horned man").

Oh, wait - why decide? His father named him Lissuin, his mother Tillon, and his friends dubbed him Tarthir.

So: backstory. If Kaguya knows two languages from his upbringing, then Lissuin Tillon Tarthir is mixed-race: probably Noldo father, Sinda mother (the Sindar like the moon, and an older Noldo would have actually seen Lissuin in flower). If not, he could be one or the other, but could still be a mix.

Customer service is an interesting one. I'm inclined to see both that and the maid thing as specifically their roles on Eressea: as a fluent Quenya-Sindarin translator, Tarthir is probably at least slightly in demand. If we assume elvish civilisation has inns, he could literally be an in-house translator at one.

Coirelótë, meanwhile, doesn't speak a word of Sindarin. Someone recommends she hire the new arrival as a translator, but, uh-oh - Valinor isn't much of a monetary economy, while Eressea has brought economics back from Middle-earth. Ultimately, they barter an agreement: Tarthir will act as Coirelótë's translator, but when he is out earning the miriain (plural of "mirian") they need to eat, she will keep house for him. She agrees, because it's a chance to get properly into this strange culture that's formed on the Lonely Isle.

It's probably mid-Third Age; that way Tarthir can be the first of his immediate family to arrive, and not have anyone other than this Light-Elf from out west to house-share with.

For a proper Tolkien joke, I suggest the inn he works at be named I Thoron a Chên.

hS

(Oh, all right... this inn. You can call it I Aew a 'Winig if you're feeling casual.)

This has never happened, the mini-daruma never made noise before. I will take full responsibility for this grave oversight; I can try training the mini to be quiet before sending it back to you. Once again, I am terribly sorry about this 💦

---

[[Yuki speaking: Yay, it's the one my agents sent (since you only got one, let's say it's Ichimokurens)! Since I can't work this into Guyatchi's dialogue up there, Imma add it here: the daruma is traditionally a lucky item, so RC 381 sent their mini-daruma as a token of New Year goodwill to whoever shall receive them. I do have one request however: don't put stories featuring them on AO3, Wattpad, LiveJournal and Dreamwidth. Other sites/Google Docs are cool though 😉]]

A middle-aged Latino woman with dark hair and a smile as warm as her reindeer sweater walked up to the present pile. "Thank you for including a plus-one on the invitations. I'm glad I could make it; the Nursery holiday party takes just as long to clean up from as the party itself! Now, um..." She looked at the boxes, then the list of rules, and then at the boxes again. "These aren't going to explode in my face, are they?"

Two rows from the front, Miguel facepalmed. "Ay, Mamá, it was one box, two years ago, and I didn't even get that one."

"You can't blame me for being worried about my boy," Diane replied in rapid-fire Spanish. Then she picked up a red box with black ribbon and carefully opened it. "Awww, what a cute doll! Miguel, look, it's like a little man!"

As soon as she took it out of the box, however, the daruma doll let out a piercing "Nyahahahahahahahaha!", startling Diane into dropping it on the stage.

"What on God's green earth is this? Who put a laughing doll in the pile?"

Kaguya's 香久也 can be translated as "everlasting fragrance", though of course the chief meaning of his name is that it sounds like the name of that popular folktale character from the moon. Momoka's 桃花 just means "peach flower". I tried actually naming these babies, the former something having to do with the moon and the latter with flowers and/or spring. I don't remember what I ended up with though 😆

On backstory: given the latter's original self being a maid to the former's original self, and original Kaguya's speaking two languages fluently and having experience in customer service, how do you think this can be carried over to the AU?

Honestlg, I checked the gaqe at least three or four times, I have no idea what hajyened.

(All right, I'll stog... I mean stop.)

So what do the names translate as? Wikipedia throws me a "not a clue, depends on the kanji", which is accurate but unhelpful.

hS

Sorry, but I'm notoriously sharp-eyed about that kinda thing 🤣🤣🤣 But that aside, wow, cool backstories you got there.

Looking forward to whatever you have of it. ^_^

I'm so glad we did the research. Like... it's objectively entirely pointless, and doesn't even enhance anyone's enjoyment of the actual stories, but for a certain type of person it is /so nice/ to finally know.

hS

I don't think I'll leave a particularly long review because I'm on mobil, but

1. Y'all did a fantastic job making everyone's feelings vivid and detailed when needed, especially during the first pile of kisses etc, without being purple about it.

2. The bit near the end about the singing was touching and then funny

3. Even though this is mainly a romance, it was still noticably a PPC work (the thing with the vampire, for example, just felt very HQ)

(Not adopting - I have more than enough grumpy elves already! But I enjoy this sort of thing, and people might feel like borrowing aspects of it.)

I think #1 (Kayuga?) is clearly of the Third Age; the autumn theme makes that obvious, and his costume's not really warlike enough for the earlier ages anyway. He's probably from Rivendell; he's a bit too finely/non-naturalistically dressed for Lorien or the Greenwood.

My feel is that he was born in Lindon in the Second Age, of Noldo or Sinda lineage. He may have been part of Elrond's party that established Imladris, but in any event he moved there before the Third Age began. He could be part of a wandering company (like Gildor's early in Fellowship), or just hang out in the Hall of Fire listening to the tales. (The Third Age is 3000+ years long; he can have done both!)

In contrast, #2 (Momoka?) is clearly a Vanya, one of the Light Elves who never left Valinor. I think she's quite young - she doesn't remember the Two Trees herself, and might not even have been born at the change in the World and the end of the Second Age. She's lived most or all of her life in a Blessed Realm utterly separated from the mundane, and it shows in her personality.

So how did they meet? No Vanya would travel to Middle-earth, and no exile would return to Valinor proper. Kayuga would have come back to Tol Eressea... and I think that's where they met.

Picture Momoka as a bright-eyed traveller, exploring every corner of Valinor while her family is content to stay in Valimar of the bells. She befriends Noldor in Tirion, and Falmari (we don't say Teleri, it's rude) in Alqualonde, and even visits the ruins of Formenos from the bad old days. Finally, there's nowhere else to go...

... except east. She hitches a ride on a swanship and makes her landing on Eressea. Here, at last, is a whole new culture to learn about - three or four cultures, in fact, because the Noldor, Sindar, and Nandor aren't exactly integrated! And there she meets... Kayuga, who has just stepped off the boat from Middle-earth and isn't at all convinced by any of this.

As for names... what do their names translate to? Kayuga would have a Sindarin name, Momoka's would be (Vanyarin) Quenya, but she probably also speaks Telerin. That means they can juuust about communicate at first, with Kayuga knowing a bit of book-Quenya and Momoka getting about a third of what he says in Sindarin. But they won't translate their names, naturally.

One name I can do is Kayuga's epesse/aftername/nickname, 'stiff-faced'. Amazingly, there is a Sindarin word for 'stiff' in exactly this sense: "tarlang" means "stiff-necked", and was applied to particularly stubborn men. Kayuga's epesse would thus be Tarthir (as in caran-thir, red-faced). He'd probably use it after his birth name, but could use it alone if he wanted.

(I suspect both of them would actually have two birth-names: a regular one from their fathers, and a more meaningful/slightly prophetic one from their mothers. Most elves only used one of these in daily life.)

That was fun. ^_^

hS

Here’s an illustration for the clock tower scene!

The Force is Life.

Across the Galaxy it has been given myriad names: Ashla, the Life Current, the Great Presence, simply It. It has been seen as an emanation of living beings, as an energy field binding star to star, as a spirit that watches over its adherents. But all those who touch it agree on one point:

The Force is Life.

Nightsisters. Navigators. Sorcerers. Monks. There are as many ways to touch the Force as there are adherents. Each of us perceives it in our own way, through the lens of our own reality.

Jedi. Sith.

Some of us have been allies. Some of us have been enemies. Many of us have been the bitterest of foes. But one understanding connects us:

The Force is Life.

And the Warp is not.

The Warp is madness and death. I have seen the Warp, have been bound within its shackles of insanity, have faced its lures and promises of death, and have only escaped by the strength of my will and the Force that is in me. If any of you have believed the Warp to be an aspect of the Force - as I once did - put aside that notion, for it is a lie. The Warp is the antithesis of Life.

And we can destroy it.

Tens of thousands of years ago, all knowledge of the Force was combined. All our countless orders worked together as one. Now, to face this abomination from another galaxy, we must join together once more.

I have seen that the Warp draws its corrosive power from turmoil in the souls of the living. Each of us who touch the Force know of the need to focus our will upon it - and this very focus, this control of our own spirits, can be applied to the vile Warp. Calm your minds, soothe those around you, and - whether you follow the ways of Ashla or Bogan - the Force will work through you to still the roiling Warp, and weaken the unnatural creatures that dwell within it.

If we every one of us combines our will - the Force of an entire galaxy united at last - we can give the daemons of the Warp the fate they have offered so many others.

Madness. And death.

I have foreseen it.

• Message from Emperor Palatine, broadcast across all accessible networks and frequencies, 997.M41.

The many adherents of the Force receive Palpatine's appeal in myriad ways. Some ignore it. Others mock it as a transparent attempt to bring them under Sith control. Others - among them the Knights of Ren, the Sorcerors of Tund, and the sky-walkers of the Chiss - accept it wholeheartedly.

The resurgent Jedi Order, at the very limits of the transmission's reach, convenes a great Council of every member it can summon. Masters, Knights, and Padawans sit side by side, debating the message and its hidden meanings. Master Yoda is firmly opposed, remembering Chancellor Palpatine's betrayal. Luke Skywalker is more ambivalent, reasoning that all the Emperor is suggesting is the same battle meditation the Jedi have employed against the Tyranids for years.

In the end, it is the Lion of Caliban who tips the balance. Though a mere padawan, he stands tall amongst his fellow Jedi that day. "I do not know this false Emperor," he says, "but his words are true. The Warp brings only madness and death. The Jedi are - must be - its sworn enemy. By the strength of the Force, let its vile whispers be silenced at last."

---

My inclination is to say that Palpatine's plan, as written, will calm the currents of the Warp in locations with heavy Force user concentrations. That should weaken enemy Psykers and (particularly) Chaos creatures in the vicinity, and also have some effect on the Rift, but nothing major.

It will also make it easier for ships of the Imperium to travel. That's great for Palpatine - his Empire isn't in contact with the Imperium right now anyway! Not so great for everyone else.

It won't affect the Chaos Gods , of course. But it will begin the process of attuning the minds of the galaxies to the Force, and thus preparing them to accept a singular will: Palpatine's.

One mind to rule them all.

---

The key conflict in this whole story is that 40K is a setting where individuals don't matter. There are no true heroes (or villains, because that's just the same thing from a different version of the story), because even the greatest individual is nothing against the galaxy of war. Bobby Gulls has achieved basically nothing in the prime timeline; just a continuation of the grind.

But Star Wars is very much a story of heroes. One shot can end an empire. One hand can steer a galaxy. One word can rewrite fate.

So far, we've got a lot of hero-centred writing, but none of it has really changed anything. By attempting to turn the Force and all its adherents into an extension of his own plans, Palpy is making a concerted effort to change that.

hS

On a whim, I decided to imagine Guyatchi and Momotchi as Tolkienian elves, and since I don't trust my own ability to actually write their AU selves, they're up for adoption as OCs. Aside from the designs, they have no info whatsoever; the adopter is free to fill in the blanks.

I only request that anyone wishing to adopt characters/minis written by me or writing stories featuring my agents not post their creations on AO3, Wattpad, LiveJournal and Dreamwidth – I have been harassed on 3 of these sites, let's not open another wound. I also request that stories featuring characters written by me not include direct links to any of my accounts.

Bad kinkfic would almost certainly fall under the jurisdiction of one or the other in the absence of overriding WTF elements. I feel I must state that "this fic features X kink" probably doesn't count as WTF in a fic clearly labeled as "X kinkfic," even if the kink's existence comes as a surprise. The handling of it may, but I still reckon it's most likely a matter for the department that specializes in adult-content fic.

A division of Bad Slash that handles bad kinkfic would make sense to me, actually. You would want specialized agents who are familiar with good kinkfic and have a formidable ability to practice tolerance when it comes to premises that are squicky to lots of folks.

~Neshomeh