Subject: I like it.
Author:
Posted on: 2018-04-11 15:04:00 UTC

I can tell you've not read So You Want To Be A Wizard [recently?] - my Manual is extremely different from Nita's (the only one we get significant text from), so the similarities show what you're working from. But that's all right - I wrote mine that way for a reason, and I think the same reasons would carry across to you.

I think you've integrated the Manual very well with her (your? How are we referring to self-insert fics?) personal story; better than I have! 'Jacob' is pretty much a blank slate with opinions; 'Siobhan' is a backstory in herself. (An aside - given the continuous Celtic influences in the Young Wizards books, the name fits very nicely.)

The main thing I'd flag up is the result of the way you're building on my story: Siobhan's Manual doesn't seem to talk about the main reason for the existence of wizardry, which is to battle against the entropy and death introduced to the universe by the Lone Power. (Aside #2 - I'm not sure 'Lonely Power' is ever used in the canon, though I'm also not sure it im't.) I mentioned it in passing, so it's understandable it didn't make it across to yours.

Finally: I love the idea of parsing history through the lens of wizardry. It makes perfect sense to me. It's not something Diane Duane does very much (she mostly pokes at mythology instead), but as a function of the world, it's something that absolutely should happen.

I certainly hope you'll continue the story! (How much do you know about the series? I don't remember you chiming in before...)

hS

PS: So come on, that's two... who else is going to tell their tale? :D

PPS: 'Robert Brain' sounds like a comic-book supervillain. ^_~

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