Subject: Scandal!
Posted on: 2022-05-12 17:51:13 UTC

We at the Gossip Monitor have just received word from a Suvian publication! Inconceivable! Let's go talk to Patrol Officer Epsilion for an inside scoop on this sort of phenomenon.

"When I think about this, I think of that old quote of fighting monsters in the abyss, how you'll become one. We've all fought a lot of monsters and looked into a lot of abysses, so I think it's apt. Got to wonder. What sort of glitter-monsters are marinating in these walls? I think if an Agent doesn't crack, they start to glitter. Why else would I have a job?

We should cycle Agents. Keeping pairs is good, one can report if the other goes rotten, but we need vacation time. Our troops deserve it. Otherwise they start to glitter, and make stuff like that. Time is a knot here anyway. Better we do it slow than do it wrong.

For the DMS: You! Agent! Put down that glittery sword! It'll corrupt you! That rose-pink-gold katana of flame may seem a conversation piece, but it'll ruin you!"

Fascinating words, fascinating. Send your reports to the one and only:

Gossip Monitor

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