Subject: Agent Peregrin Sets Things on Fire
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Posted on: 2016-09-25 04:49:00 UTC

A/N: I was reading the PPC hunger games, and I was inspired to write a fic about Peregrin being badass and setting stuff on fire. Also, does anyone know a good beta?



Agent Peregrin was on a mission with some pyros because he was better at making bombs than most of the department. He didn't transfer, though, because he thought DoGA were wimps. The world was twisted into brain-breaking shapes by an uncanonical forest. Peregrin couldn't stand it, so he charged in with his flamethrower. The other agents tried to hold him back, yelling "We don't even have most of the charges!", but Peregrin didn't care. He just wanted to burn stuff.

Peregrin quickly finished the mission (by destroying everything in sight) and went back to his RC, #112358. He'd never figured out where those numbers came from, or why there were commas and an ellipsis on the sign. He spent some time reading, and then took a short nap. He didn't need to work around his partner, since he didn't have one because he was just that good solo.

When he woke up, he decided to go to the Canon Library to get more reading material. He wandered the halls for a while and eventually stumbled on the library. The librarian didn't want to give him more books because the ones he had were 'overdue'. After about a minute of these complaints, Peregrin flew into a rage and planted a small grenade on the checkout records. The Librarian managed to dodge, but the records (and a good part of the desk they were on) were destroyed. The explosion also started a fire, which burned down several shelves of books, but Peregrin didn't care. Those were replaceable anyway, right?

While Peregrin was storming out the library and venting about how he still hadn't managed to get his books, he remembered that his vacation request from two days ago hadn't gone through. He'd put in for two weeks vacation after a particularly nasty (in his opinion) mission earlier in the week. So, instead of heading back to his RC, he tried to go to the Marquis' office. Normally, the hallways in HQ would have prevented him from getting there quickly, but he used his powers (A/N: what were those again?) and sheer force of will to make it straight there.

After he'd busted the door to Personnel down, the Marquis asked him, Agent Peregrin, what are you doing here?

"I want to know why you haven't approved my vacation paperwork yet," he answered with a cold fury.

I haven't approved your request because you had a vacation only a few months ago, and since you have given no justification for your current application

"The hell I haven't justified my application! You and that damm sunflower have been throwing an EXTREMELY big workload on me, and that's on top of all the stuff I'm doing with DoGA! I need a vacation NOW!."

Both Mary Sues and Geographical Aberrations are severely understaffed right now, so a heavy workload is to be expected.

"I don't CARE!" Peregrin's face was growing bright red with anger. "I'm taking. a. break."

Right then, Peregrin opened a portal to his home continuum. The Marquis tried to stop him and called security. Peregrin didn't want to be stopped, so he took his flamethrower and burned the Flower to a crisp.

As the daisy was dying, security stormed into the office. They didn't really like the Marquis, because he was maen and stupid, so they let Peregrin jump through the portal. (Later, they resurrected the Flower so no one would notice).

Two weeks later, Peregrin came back to his RC, noticeably calmer. He'd spent most of the last two weeks rampaging through Arbe, sacking concents and burning their libraries (he was still bitter about the Canon Librarian). His console had several messages from the Sunflower Official, who wanted to meet with him about the "incident" in the Personnel offices two weeks earlier.

After making himself at home, Peregrin went Upstairs and had his meeting. The SO told him that he'd thought about punishing Peregrin somehow, but that he had noticed that Peregrin was one of the better agents in the department, and so he could get away with a few incidents. He didn't even say a word about the DoGA mission. Then, the SO assigned him a partner, Tomash, so that they could learn about the ways of the PPC from an experienced agent. Peregrin was glad that the Flowers had seen reason about his need for a vacation, and he went back to his RC to meet up with his new partner, hoping that they were as awesome as he was.

(( OOC: I have driven Agent (ex-Fraa) Peregrin severely out of character. He would almost certainly never do any of these things without an extremely, extremely good reason. ))

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